Teller of HerStory.

The One That Got Away

2012-01-31T23:33:00.002+08:00

hello blog,
I know I've been disappeared for some time.

I don't know why;
maybe some words are better to left unsaid.

As we grow older,
wrecked things that happened make us grow speechless day by day.
Including me.

It makes me unhappy, very unhappy.

the reality is killing me softly inside.

I am officially a working lady now. I am out to society and totally detached from my previous honeymoon student life.
ya. I am beginner to this society, I am waiting to be slaughter by this mean place. D:

Started work for almost a month already,
but I'm still at the stage of "know nothing"...
& it makes me feel so uncomfortable~

I don't know whether the co-workers are nice or not because they are so busy with their work.
Ya there are ppl willing to teach me, yet I still feel uncomfy with the environment.
they seldom smile, they look secretive, some look fierce( well maybe they r just serious about the job), some look very annoyed like I'm some kind of annoyer.

there are many more I don't know how to describe it one by one.
I just don't get used to it. NOT AT ALL.
sigh.

yet I need to face it. I have to. Avoid couldn't solve the problem. right?

by the way, I've cut my hair. Many gives good compliments about it, but for me, I don't know..
short hair or long hair is the same, is still me, makes no difference. hah (=

#MY LONG HAIR

#SHORT HAIR #CNY DAY4

my baby sidney with her CNY RIBBON!

ENJOY this song.. awesome one by Katy Perry again [the one that got away]

xoxo

14/12/2011

2011-12-15T22:53:00.003+08:00

it was my beloved's birthday on this lovely December month....

Went #Genting with My Sagittarius boy <3
well we stayed a night at Genting Resort, is a free room which hubby got it as a gift from #Genting.
It was a 4 star hotel, not bad thou better than first world.

Is us; with my retard face a.k.a. braces.

is was us having fun with my galaxy note camera.

he doesn't like me kissing ! ooppsssssss

but he definitely love to pinch & bully me!!!

I love this picture ever........ <3

oh no I'm gonna start my working life on the coming Tuesday!! & I'm feeling very very nervous for that. Afraid that I might screw things up, being blur, catch up slow and create trouble for others..

Yea no doubt I am a very useless person. D:

Sigh. but still gotta face it.

there's gonna be a long post coming up soon. I have too much to flood in my blog or should say there's too much keeping inside and it gonna be vomited out.

teehee.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY BELOVED BOY FRIEND.

JE' TAIME
ME GUSTAS
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!

*hee...*

谁明白

2011-12-13T02:43:00.001+08:00

原来

我看不起虚伪的妳

妳假得让我觉得恶心

妳的面具已带得无法摘下

如果妳能看得见我因为妳的转变

而感到痛苦

妳会停下来走回当初吗

能让我解脱吗

我快被折疼得迷失……

我快撐不下去了

妳乖喔让我喘—喘气

拜托

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Back to december

2011-12-08T02:44:00.002+08:00

Oh great.. My new samsung galaxy note vanishes all my photos in my blog... Thanks to the "sync" tool..

so i am here to share my recent narcisstic pic..lol

Taken by samsung galaxy note of course muahahahah

Yaiksthe rest of the posts is like trash now..all photos dissapeares .. I guess I'd better edit it soon with my lappie ;)

Ohh finally I've done with my FYP which is the final year project... N I'm ready GRADUATE?? Nah..not so soon..

Still have two sessions of internship to complete.. Which means i gotta get my ass off to work!!

Sigh... hard to get a job these days..

As I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING about the real business field :(

Trouble.. Sigh.. No one knows how stress i am in the inside... =/

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匿

2011-11-09T15:25:00.006+08:00

有些事情还是假装不知道就好…

知道了看到了只会让自己不舒服

所以，何必呢？

过去始终是过去

再回首也改变不了什么也无法回到从前

所以，何必呢？

放下过去放下执着

放低那个高傲的自己
执着嫉妒生气改变不了已发生的事实

既然知道伤心无法改变什么
那么就诚实一点

做一些让自己好过一点痛快一点舒服一点的事情吧

别把某些人或事物看得太重
别太在乎了

你在乎人家人家也不见得在乎你
还是在乎自己的好

要记得陷得深也伤得深

你无法掌握别人，但你能掌握自己

别让自己的执著毁了自己好吗？

生气之前，选择折磨自己之前…
好好想想那个人或那件事情值得你这样让自己受苦吗

“不值得，他/它算什么”

噢，那就不生气了。因为生气等于折腾自己的心情而已

学会
看轻些
看淡些
少在乎些

或许这样
情绪会变得平静些
不再起伏不定

很多时候

没情绪会比情绪化来得更具优势一些

不要再折腾自己了。

嗯

不再折腾自己了。

October 26th

2011-11-01T22:17:00.008+08:00

Its been a really long time since I've last blogged... & this time would be a special blog post..

It was my birthday. 21st birthday. is an age that I'm suppose to get a "key" from my parents, Which I did not..Maybe my parents just don't keen on this kind of traditional/culture. hah. As expected, my family are not going to celebrate with me & it'll just be a normal day.

Oh yes I've expected this outcome earlier & I swear, I'am ready to stay all night at home watching TV, eating ice-cream on the birthday eve. with the boyfie. for sure.

But, that day didn't happen as what I've expected.

This guy, he enlightens my dull birth-day celebration by prepared all sort of surprises for me.

Can't tell how touched I was for what he has done.

No doubt I'm definitely happy ! Looking happy too. hah.

And the guy in this photo. is my cutie boyfie.
he's my boy, Mr Jackie Kwan.

Yea He took this photo for me with his Birthday gift.
An unexpected gift.

and then, the unexpected surprises..
He invited all of my besties to celebrate my birthday!
Yea like ALL of them. Except TWO that absent.. (=

surprised me with cake @26th Oct, 12.16AM

Group Shot. I have a tired face that day. ooops.

Yea. Happy Birthday to me !
Officially 21 now ♥

Finally, thanks hubby. I know you do love & cherishes me.
I Love you too; more than I can say.

♥

Love you like a love song

2011-10-16T03:55:00.000+08:00

This song is still as awesome as the first time I heard it on radio.

Loves.

友情？

2011-09-19T23:40:00.002+08:00

很感慨…

友情对你来说
到底是什么？

为何你可以把它弄得那么廉价…

我真的很失望

看着你一点悔意都没有
做错了还可以理直气壮地无中生有？
对于你这种态度我真的无话可说

我实在是很无言也感到非常的非常的心痛

一点也没有变
没有学好
没有检讨

对于你这种态度
我真的无法恭维
也无法视而不见

更无法认同

damn speechless...
always never from mistake or lessons...

Sigh....

good luck to you.. Hope you live happy, sincerely...

*That's the end of our friendship* kthxbye!

天蠍•

2011-08-19T17:41:00.000+08:00

天蝎女生表面坚强，嘴巴硬，说话狠。

其实内心很容易受到伤害。当自己的恋人做了让她们很难过的事，她们心里默默地难过，感觉自己像个受伤的，却勇敢站在人群中的雕像一样，漠然地看着身边那些恋人们的甜蜜欢笑。

这时的天蝎说话比平常少得多，没有心情再像平时那样和周围的人谈笑风声。

【短篇1】

天蝎很冷
很多人第一次和天蝎接触
应该都会觉得天蝎像一座冰山

话不多
静静地听着大家说话

但是如果你多接触几次天蝎
你就会发现

原来他也是喜欢开玩笑的
喜欢打打闹闹的
好像一个小孩子
容易哄

【短篇2】

有时候突然心情很低落
不想说话也不想动
别人问起
也不知道该怎样回答
也许是因为突然看见一句话
也许是看见某个物体联想到了什么
也许是从朋友那听来的一件小事
也许什么都不是
很多事情不需要理由
也没有理由

【短篇3】

遇见伤痛的时候
天蝎座会原谅自己爱的那个人
而且还会傻傻的给那个人找到伤害自己的理由
一面因为怕失去爱人
一面因为想安慰自己
不管你给天蝎带来的伤痛是怎么巨大
但是只要天蝎还有一分爱你
就一定不会为那99分的痛而说出分手
即便说了
那也一定只是气话
天蝎一定还会回到你的身边
选择原谅

【短篇4】

天蠍座的她:

1• 天生善良，感情脆弱
2• 天蝎平常的脾气是典型的外冷内热
3• 天蝎的耐性是不好的
4• 天蝎天生就有一种保护人的欲望
5• 最讨厌人性的两点：背叛与撒谎
6• 做事不喜拖泥带水
7• 对让他失望的人，冷酷到底，没有几次改过机会
8• 醋意是满足的
9• 天蝎很囉嗦
10• 天蝎的心很软

【短篇5】

Sent by Maxis from my BlackBerry® smartphone

【女生】共勉之

2011-08-11T19:26:00.001+08:00

•分享•

1• 学会低调,取舍间,必有得失 …切需記得『有得必有失』

2• 做自己的决定。然后准备好承担后果。

3• 慎言，独立。学会妥协的同时，也要坚持自己最基本的原则。

4• 明白付出并不一定有结果。

5• 过去的事情可以不忘记，但一定要放下。

6• 要快乐，要开朗，要坚韧，要温暖，对人要真诚。

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HerSelf.Myself

2011-08-07T03:43:00.004+08:00

This is seriously, mainly a NARCISSISTIC post of mine. Please close this page if this post annoys you, I don't born to please everyone lor! Lols. Shall start with some same old lame introduction of me first perhaps. #lmao. I'm currently, still, a 20-yr-old in the month of August; A 3rd-yr-student that struggles to get her independent project & finals done Nicely, oh-yeah she does hope for PERFECTLY too but that's way too far to achieve now. So just aim for NICELY first, hopefully can reach that aim lor. Sigh. She feels so small.low self-esteem.and totally aim for "just right" to pass her coming final exams, which starts on coming Wed D; Oh-gosh she still have the mood to blog right nowwwwww & it's 4a.m. already. gahhhhhhhhh I shall wake up earlier later & STUDY STUDY STUDY. I mean it!!

These are the pictures taken from Riverside a.k.a. Joc's birthday.
Oh ya what I wanna say is, I still fucking have the "sau nga" laughter/look after putting on braces!
sighhh till the max lor!
neverminddddd at least I still see some changes of my teeth after few months with braces On.
:D

Camwhored session!! With Joc's fabulous Canon Camera & Idk what model is that. #Lol.
I love the effect of the camera and also the add-on effect by Picnik.
awesome lar cause I don't look like me!
#lmaoooooo

I love this pic a lot. My skin looks good. Hair color looks wonderful. and my eyes fucking Big enough than Joc's :P
lol I'm just seriously JOKING aight.
Love this shot because I'm with my best gf♥.

alrightsss, last but not least, I love this shot most because I look fucking fair and my hair looks seriously silky. No joke. Don't play play, tau? LOL.

Nahhh, that's not the main reason. I ♥ it cause I took it right in front of my hubby boy and he has his fucking "ngo jip sau mm dou" look after realizing his gf, which is me, is so hell of narcissistic. #lmaooo

I feel completely amazing looking at his shock expressions, and continue non-stop taking pic of myself until he gets used to it.
but I see he's still in the "jip sau mm dou" look.
hmm.good.verygood.
I love it.
I love to see my hubby boy getting to know my true colour day by day but he's impassable.
插翅难飞.

#Lol.#Happy.

Forgive me with the F* words all around; that's my true colour, FYI. Lol justforthispost. I promise (:

till then,

xoxo !

Joc's 21st.

2011-08-06T01:28:00.006+08:00

Celebrated Miss Jocelyn Lee Wing Ping's 21st bigday on 2nd of Aug,2011. It was a Tuesday. Compared to last year, this year she had a rather simple celebration instead, with us, her same old friend that celebrated her big day last year too. Doesn't feels like posting much thou, many things happened throughout the year. Well, a year time really can happen anything, whether you like it or believe it or not. Life is fill with impermanence. Too, people do change I believe, but how they changed to is totally up to their decision, right? As long the friendship doesn't change. Ihope.♥

me & Jocelyn camwhored infront @ her bedroom all-time-fav mirror♥

Dinner ♥Michelangelo's Restaurant-Deli-Bar @ Pavillion KL

Yu Hua-ians

Little notti boy!

One-Day couple♥

Mixed fruit cake from Bread Talk, Pavillion.

Grow up♥

Short but means everything : "Friendship forever". No matter what happen we'll always be with you. Love you. Cherish you. ♥

Random- July

2011-07-30T01:05:00.001+08:00

這是我的小寶貝♥
能每天看見它…是件最幸福的事 (:

•分享•

在爱情没开始以前，
你永远想象不出会那样地爱一个人；

在爱情没结束以前，你永远想象不出那样的爱也会消失；

在爱情被忘却以前，你永远想象不出那样刻骨铭心的爱也会只留淡淡痕迹；

在爱情重新开始以前，你永远想象不出还能再一次找到那样的爱情。

忙碌是一种幸福，让我们没时间体会痛苦；
奔波是一种快乐，让我们真实的感受生活；
疲惫是一种享受，让我们无暇空虚

你不玩生活，生活就把你玩了

我得好好加油.•必勝•

xoxo

Sent by Maxis from my BlackBerry® smartphone

連夢都失控•

2011-07-13T16:11:00.002+08:00

稚氣的我•曾經的我

•分享•的一篇

給想愛…正在愛…和失去愛的…

•不要相信日韩肥皂剧中所谓的因为不能让彼此幸福而离开。

•是否想过，你们正是对方的幸福。

•爱不是逃避，是努力。

☑☑不是逃避着给彼此幸福的责任，而是努力的实现让彼此幸福的义务。

☑☑当你说离开是为了不让对方受到伤害的时候，你已经给对方造成了最大的伤害。

•爱就是要努力在一起。

•不要因为害怕彼此离开而体谅。

•体谅是因为爱，而不是因为恐惧。

•爱是一种责任，不可以轻易的离开。

•让你为离开而恐惧的人，算不上爱人，就付出再多，要离开的人，终究是会离开。

•不要觉得不了解也会有爱情。

•在不了解的时候，我们仅仅是喜欢，达不到爱情。

•当彼此的缺点暴露出来以后，很多时候这喜欢也就会结束了。

☑爱是宽容，爱着彼此的一切。

•爱上不了解的人，或许，你爱的只是他的新奇罢了。

•不要相信对你说不介意你跟异性过于亲密的人。

•这样的人不是骗你就是在玩你，或者根本就不在意你。

•你会不介意你的爱人和异性亲密到忘记你存在的地步么？

•想想就知道了。或者，他本身就不介意在几个异性之间周旋。

•不要在几个异性间周旋。

☑爱情是2个人的存在，容不下第三个人。

•凡是觉得可以左拥右抱的无非是网上言情小说看多的人。

•爱情是专一的，请记好。

☑不要给彼此太多的压力。

•适当的和异性保持距离，对你们的爱情是有好处的。

•过近的距离，也许会在不经意间，做出让彼此难堪的举动。

☑不要去欺骗你的爱人。

•记得，若你没有骗他一辈子的把握，那么便对他说实话。

•当谎言一再被揭穿的时候，有可能一切都结束了。

•不要觉得样貌会成为很大的障碍。

•60年后，有没有人能没有皱纹，没有白发？谁又能不变衰老，不变矮小。

•也许你没有貌，但你有才。也许你没有才，但你温柔。也许你没有温柔，但你……

☑也许你什么都没有，但是也许，他正爱着你的平凡。

•不要把周围的环境看的太重。

☑谈恋爱的是你们，和周围的人又有什么关系。

☑但是请善待彼此的家人，朋友。很多东西，只是给自己的借口罢了。

心碎到終點會迎刃而解－《指望》郁可唯

別懷疑，現在的我很幸福…因為我正在努力的实现让彼此幸福的义务♡

Sent by Maxis from my BlackBerry® smartphone

60's

2011-07-08T17:08:00.000+08:00

I'm trying out the 1960's pix effect..
As my hairstyle now r looking damn old school.
See my fringe; is looking so alike with my mom during her young times..
Gosh.. I really looked like her! Lols..
Hubby likes me looking old-school instead of the previous one...
So perhaps I shall change my entire look into the 60's..
Lol !

Oh no my darik circles and eye bags r getting serious day by day!

Assignments and projects are killing me! The stress is huge D:

Sent by Maxis from my BlackBerry® smartphone

痛心

2011-07-01T23:33:00.002+08:00

前些天得知了母校發生命案，
我的心莫名感到辛酸。
雖然都畢業好幾年了…
但，育華是我成長的地方…
是擁有我大部份美好回憶的地方…

從小學直到中學…
我心係育華是不容質疑的

今天看到新聞報導，記者採訪了死者的家人…當死者的父親眼看著棺木被抬下待火葬的那一刻…那父親終於再也抵不住悲傷，哭了起來…
而我，只透過電視螢幕看到那一幕的我，也禁不住的哭了起來… 雖然只是個短短幾分鍾的報導，可是那痛心的感覺我也能感受到…何況是死者的家屬…

學弟，
雖然我不認識你，也不懂你的為人性格…但，我為你輕生的決定感到非常的痛心。解決問題的方法可以有幾百种，可是就沒有自殺這個方式…
你怎麼不再勇敢一點點呢？
你既然有勇氣跳下去，那你怎麼沒勇氣去面對對你不公的事呢？
倘若說真的讓別人給冤枉了那就大聲的說出來，哪怕是沒人相信，沒人支持！
哪怕全世界只剩下你一個…選擇自殺絕對是一種逃避，並不是解脫也不是解決的方法。
你知道你這樣帶給了愛你的人多少傷痛嗎？
你怎麼能那麼自私的丟下愛你的家人不管？
你的離去，讓我們覺得很惋惜很遺憾很痛心… 現在只願你一路走好，到上帝的身邊去…願你安息吧…

-»̶̥·̵̭̌✽̤̥̈̊✽̤̥̈̊·̵̭̌»̶̥

各位育華的同胞們，還記得嗎？
" 訓勉吾曹，忠勇誠毅。"

忠•勇•誠•毅

Sent by Maxis from my BlackBerry® smartphone

Westport

2011-06-26T18:09:00.008+08:00

It was on 23rd June, Thursday. Me & My darling MIA TANG went to a half-day trip organized by our lecturer Ms Ho- BB309 Strategic Management. The trip was a typical STUDY-trip as we're visiting this largest port at klang which is WESTPORT where it runs by a pure private shipping firm instead of the Gov't. Overall the presentation was kinda boring & makes me feel nothing but sleepy, can't even take pictures in the Auditorium as the speaker threaten to confiscate our cell-phones if he caught us using it during the presentation. yaiks..

Shall let the pictures do the talking! ;)

Westport!

My darling MIA with the dolphins.

view from the top...

imported cars looking like TOY cars from the top. lol

having "bus tour"..

all pics taken from the bus! :D

nothing but CONTAINERS!

something I often seen it from TV show..
now its right infront of me! (;

I didn't manage to snap the SHIPS photo.. Those ships are too huge to fit in the photo.. Overall it was quite eye-opened as the technology & the yield planning by this company are doing fine! Their port was at the top of the world shipping list!

I guess that's all for it as I still have to present a detailed-report about westport during the coming class in order to share with the classmates who didn't joined!

till then,

xoxo

June 13th;

2011-06-14T02:46:00.005+08:00

It was the bff's birthday. My dear, Ms See Yan is officially 21 now. Gosh! time really just passed like that without hesitating. I've known this fat strawberry lady for like 8 years already. We're always there for each other no matter what; that's what I always feel glad about, I'm there for her, she's there for me.♥

Hope you like the gift that I bought for you. I know it's not a Gucci or Prada, lolz. You should get what I mean ;). But somehow maybe someday I might get you the first C. Who knows? haha.

Went to T.G.I. Friday @ The Garden for a simple celebration. No club. No alcohol. Just a simple dinner with our simple same old friends. but This year without the Ms. Pit Thing, feel kinda weird thou. lolz.

Bday girl' ♥

the buddies ♥

us ♥

Seriously, I'm absolutely feeling dumb for going for braces check-up that day! It hurts and I can't enjoy the meal at all. Bad bad bad. I'm so stupid. The blue rubber(braces) looks nice but it makes awful feeling on my teeth. My teeth are having battles, feel kinda pushy around them. ok in short, IT HURTS!! D:

best picture of the day ♥

Happy Birthday my beloved !
Love you always ♥

xoxo

Enchanted

2011-06-13T01:33:00.000+08:00

I learned that the photo was kinda blur. But I personally love this shot. Lovin' it much. How nice if is a clear one. Nevermind, is okay. Our love still continues no matter if its a blur or clear. "He's not the best looking, he's not the smartest guy, he can be a jerk sometimes, but for some reason I don't care. I love him and he's the perfect one for me."

♥

2011-06-09T03:42:00.001+08:00

几米的画，

总是能够诠释心底某些

说不出来的感觉…

这两幅画，

给她

给我

和给你。

我们总是以为，我们会找到一个自己很爱很爱的人。

可是当我们回首，才发觉自己曾经多么天真。

假如从来没有开始，你怎么知道自己会不会很爱那个人呢？

其实，很爱很爱的感觉，

是要一起经历了许多事情之后才会发现的。

茫茫人海可以找到一个心爱的人，

这是多么大的福气，

或许没有你想象那么好，

应该也不会糟糕到哪里，

所以要知福惜福好好珍惜，

多说关怀话，少说责备话。

爱情合理就好，

不要委屈将就，

不要相信完美的爱情。

其实彼此有缺点，

有一种纯朴的可爱就足够了。

我们拥有一双鞋子的时候，

才会明白失去另一双鞋的滋味。

消逝的爱情总是刻骨铭心的，

珍惜或放下

都是生命中必经的过程。

相爱的时候需要真诚，

争执的时候需要沟通，

生气的时候需要冷静，

愉快的时候需要分享，

指责的时候需要谅解，

过日子的时候需要包容。

祝福你♥

Againts all odds

2011-06-02T20:58:00.002+08:00

To be successful , the only thing you could do is againts all odds and breathe hard again. Don't judge as I'm some kind of complicated person. Maybe sometimes I might act that kind of way, but please, I'm a human too. I made mistakes. But what I hope is, there's always a someone to remind me whenever I'm about make mistake again. I need changes to be an improved person. No one wish to live in the past and stop moving forward.

Lastly, I'm just the girl that always has her phone in her hands, headphones in her ears and that one guy on her mind. As simple as that. Say hi to me if you know me! Pls, I DEMAND this! As I'm a little introvert and half-blinded most of the time.. Not that I'm behaving arrogantly. Is just that I really can't SEE you.

Yaiks. Call me the buta girl D:

Seems like there's so much thing for me to do! But when I wanna start doing it, likes nothing to do already.

Apa macam? D:

Lol

Xoxo
Sent by Maxis from my BlackBerry® smartphone

Just A Kiss

2011-06-02T02:24:00.001+08:00

If you love "Need You Now" by Lady Antebellum,

you might love the new release as well, "Just A Kiss".

xoxo.

♡ blogging

2011-05-23T22:16:00.008+08:00

♡ ♡ ♡

Hello Peoples! How's life?

ohh well.. I've fallen sick... like finally..
due to the imba weather in M'sia...
and It always raining when I'm outdoor...
yaiks...
finally I'm having sore throat and fever and of coz, bad temper D:

Sigh.

or perhaps I shall reduce steamboat? :O

went to Unifest on Sat 21/5 @UCSI

unable to capture any more pix due to the raining weather..
see everyone is under the umbrella..
also the plastic-bag-type raincoat .__.
provided by the organizer..
well, still got total well...
the plastic bag ain't waterproof lor.
gosh = =''

I thought It'll be fun.

ends up.. :X

went to steamboat after standing in the mud or in the rain for like 15minutes..

This boy is a notti boy!

cam-whored a lil bit before heading out..
at ♡ Joc's room..

Yea well, I really do realized myself..
looking very similar with some other ppl..
sigh.
I can't help it.
Mummy born me with general look and I can't do anything to change it.

perhaps plastic surgery? :D

not a bad idea! wait me tio toto first. lol !

okay this is a random pix...
my fb got spammed by my buddy !
within 5 minutes I've gained like 60+ notifications.

♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

alrights... another random update again...
went to Joc's place AGAIN on Sun after teaching..

sure gonna cam-whored again!
this time with her Ip4..
not with my lousy BB anymore! :D

I wan an iphone4 seriously!!!!!!!
ask daddy to buy for me as 21st bday present? :D
or Ipad would be better?

gosh. IamsoGreedy D:

There are all sorts of effects in taking pix..
wonderful !!
teehee ♡

♡ Me & Her ♡
Miss Jocelyn.

Okay I wish I could blog more but my brain ain't functioning due to the viruses I'm having battle with now...

oooppsss..

sharing moment. ♡
Say ( All I Need) by OneRepublic.

I always had a thing for OneRepublic's song..
after "Secrets", next'd b this.. which I got to hear it from the vampire diaries.

awesome!

♡♡♡♡♡♡ ♡

I miss my hubby boy very much. I wonder if he's missing me too.
♡

I shall get my focus back on my studies once I've recover!

been very un-productive lately!

♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

xoxo

May

2011-05-08T02:19:00.005+08:00

It's a new semester again.
Glad that I got all my course selection problems solved.
thanks to the understanding Lecturer Mr.Foo, I always said he looks cute since MP class. and yes he's still cute, and charming. *winks*

lols darling sure gonna puke if I tell this in front of her!
She always said I have serious taste problem. wtf...

(=

Apparently year 3 subjects are much more tougher than the year 2's.
I cannot study like how I used to, during the year 2...
My result last semester was like PASS only...
gosh...
s-t-r-e-s-s-e-d.

I need to start reading star newspaper already perhaps, the business week paper... :O
or else..it gonna lead to disastrous consequences If I score something like C/D/F during my exams and finally got my CGPA ruined.

gosh...
S-T-R-E-S-S-E-D.

Its almost 2 months since I wear on braces. Well I still haven't get used to it, or maybe I just simply don't want to feel easy about it.....

I just wish 2 years time will pass like 2 months time...
hopefully my face can be V-shaped due to the braces...
and wish that I could hit 45kg with the sake of braces and also the study stresses;
best way for diet :D

ok I have a serious eye problem now..
eye bags.. swollen eyes...dark circles..

and sure... skin problem as well..
aiks..
and absolutely mouth problem too = =''
I can't even close my mouth nicely with the braces on.
yaiks............

that's y I need "edition" seriously.
muahahahaha

I always wonder did I poke the bf when I was kissing him.

god damn braces is poking me inside, all the time!

D:

first post from my lovely BB

2011-05-05T02:29:00.001+08:00

在擁有愛情以後，總是遺憾沒能及時理解，寬容，和包容對方，而無法白頭偕老。遺憾的感覺非常可怕，它能剝奪你的快樂，侵襲你的信心，甚至衍生出不甘願，等負面情緒。

當負面情緒勝過理智的時候…
接踵而來的只是一次又一次的傷害。你允許你的負面情緒懲罰你自己。

對，有些話說就容易。但做得到能有幾個？願意好好對待自己的人真的好少。
大家都似乎樂於拿別人的過錯來懲罰自己。

當然，我承認我也是同樣這般犯賤。

女生，最大的難題就是她們的情緒病。
我有情緒病。就因為我這個病，我令我愛的人辛苦，令到愛我的人吃不消。

那震撼的三個字時時刻刻在我的腦海飄浮著。

愛一個人沒有錯，錯是錯在想要佔有不僅是他的人，還有他的行蹤，想法，意見甚至是靈魂。

其實所謂的安全感全來自于信任，信心和愛。
這些我們都懂，我們都知道。

我曾經很信任，對對方有的是信心…可是結果呢？
"你讓我覺得我真是很傻很天真！"

然後就變得疑神疑鬼，當初那些信任跑了，對你的信心失蹤了。
然後爭執出現了。後來你賴我，我怪你的戲碼上演…然後男的菸酒不離手演心煩氣燥，女的天天以淚洗臉上演憂鬱症鬧自殺自殘畫面。

何苦呢？

對。何苦呢？
"你何苦呢"？

沒有答案。
我也沒辦法回答。這或許就是對自己的懲罰，總是無法學會讓自己快樂。
也或許這麼做，能換來快樂，不，應該是快感？

聽起來好變態既心理不平衡了。

但這些場面就是不斷上演。這是怎麼一回事？

那些emo的感覺，我比誰都了解。但我就快學不乖了…我快忘了那些不快樂的感覺了…

純粹因為我又愛了，我遇到一個啟發了我的人…

A true love should make one person be a better person.

他的出現，我感恩…
他讓我覺得，愛情是應該要快樂才是對的愛情。那些悲情的，猜疑的…那麼辛苦的支撐著是何苦呢？一點都不快樂。

對了，就是他的陽光晒走了我的悲觀。

他讓我有勇氣再信任一次，再冒險一次。

這就是愛上他，就是他的感覺。
雖然他缺點好多好多…
總是不呵護我的感覺，不怎麼尊重我的想法… ）：
但…
我還是願意了解他，寬容他，訓練我的心要大大的包容他。
因為我知道同樣地，他也再努力的對我好。因為，我們有愛情。

一個手掌拍不響～
只有雙方的付出，溝通，諒解和接受
彼此才能走更長遠的路。

時間過得真快。半年了…
我比之前更愛你。

請你，願你成功；快樂♡

請妳，願妳振作；成功；快樂♡

11年5月5日
嬋筆

Sometimes, the bravest thing you can do is to admit your mistakes and be responsible for them.♡

what are words ； what are Love

2011-04-25T02:39:00.014+08:00

It was a video clip I get to know from the Facebook.
Strangers, again

It is how couple's describe their relationship,
and its way to0 true for me.

Stage 1 the meeting

Stage 2 the chase
Stage 3 Honeymoon
Stage 4 Comfortable
Stage 5 Tolerance
Stage 6 Downhill

Stage 7 Breaking up

Stage 8 Stranger

but I do believe there are still couples out there still manage to hold on~
with strong beliefs and faith, to keep the relationship alive.

what can I say

It is not easy to maintain a relationship. Not easy at all.

I have been through hard times before and I seriously know exactly how it feels like.
feelings of being strangers, again.

but still, life still goes on and people moved on.

and somehow, someday, those memories will just gonna be a part of your past, or regrets that you'll never able to fix it as before again.

Therefore, the only thing you can do..
and only choice you can make now..
to make sure,
that this cycle won't happen in your coming relationship again.
promise to made an effort, if you really care about the one person you're in love with right now.

" you love me or love my past?"

*mute* guilty

.........................................................................................................................................

I'm watching this Taiwan drama currently.

《犀利人妻》

Is about the appearance of a 3rd party...
I was feeling deeply emo watching this.
gahhh...
The storyline
"Xie An Zhen was happily married with one daughter until her husband cheated on her with her cousin. And the ensuing divorce became a battle of love and wits."

all I can say is :

一旦一个人变了心，心灵都出轨了，谁还在乎你这个人在哪里
Once a person changes his or her heart, where the soul has derailed, and who still cares who are you anymore ?

This was the man's confession at the last episode:

“这一年来我想了很多，你曾经问过我，结婚十年对我来说算什么？
我现在可以回答你，那十年，是我人生中，最幸福的时光。
十年来，我承认有许多不喜欢的地方，但是我没有跟你沟通，是我不对。
我也相信这十年来，你也有许多不满意的地方，但是你很自然的包容我，体谅我。
是我自己，是我自己对青春还有不切实际的眷恋，蒙蔽我的感觉，
我怎么能够，我怎么会跟你说出我不爱你了，
我那个时候完全不知道我自己在做什么，我怎么会这样伤害你，
安真，我没有请求你的原谅，可是可不可以让我补偿你，
我愿意用我剩余的生命，好好的爱你爱萌萌，我真的失去过，所以我更懂得珍惜。这是我的真心话，我真的希望，
我用剩余的生命去换一天，不是特别的一天，
是平凡的一天，你在厨房做菜，我和萌萌荡秋千，我们进门的时候，听到你喊回来了，
然后我闻到饭香，接着我们坐在沙发上看着无聊的电视，
然后你抱怨说：最近菜价又涨了，哪一个邻居有搬走了，
然后我们可以安安稳稳的睡上八个小时。
只要这么一天，只要这一天，我觉得就算我死掉了我也想要回到这平凡的一天。”

and her response was :
回不去了。有很多事情去了就去了，都回不去了……

ya truly, when things are gone..
there's nothing you can do to trace it back like as it was the beginning again.

why?

总是等到失去后才懂得珍惜 ?

Learn to accept the fact that people do change and they do leave.

the emo queen ♡

2011-04-14T02:49:00.006+08:00

What are words? If you really don't mean them when you say them.
What are words? If they're only for good times, then they don't.

There are times, where I could only sigh helplessly.
those unspoken feelings came haunting me, decreasing the morale I had left.

Sometimes I do hate myself being hell emotional !

but there are things, you doesn't know. Even I myself, there are times I doubted myself whether I could really handle.

My shoulders are heavy, I am carrying not only my dreams, my hopes.

Sometimes I hate you for taking me for granted. You don't know me, you thought you know me. Sometimes I do hate you see things superficially, you didn't try to ask or to know better.

The way I see about something, my thoughts, oh I know you don't give a damn bout it.
If you don't even bother, then what's the point you want me to be in your life?

A companion or a puppet?

yaiks I do sounds like complaining or like expressing how much I hatred you.

If you're thinking like this, you're wrong again.

I love you more than I can say.
That's why I'm willing to tolerate all the time which most of the people doesn't believe that it was me, Ms LeeLiShan willing to tolerate to please someone.

You complaint that I've a bad temper and I should change it. wow that's a harsh statement you gave me, I feel terribly upset while I heard you saying that.

But I kept quiet if you remember.

I was thinking deeply, asking myself, am I being not good enough for you? I questioned myself, blamed myself.
The emotions starting to be awful when I'm feeling winding. Everyone knows how much I'm not being who I used to be, except you.

I don't dare to talk out loud that how much I've changed for you.
Cause you never know or realized, which means, I'm not doing good enough to make you realized.

There's so much word I wanna tell you,
it all running in the mind. but when I look at you,
there's only one word I'm able to tell you. that is I Love you.

I'm trying the best of me,
to be what you wish to see in me.
that's me way, to prove my love for you in action,
rather than just speaking of words.

omg. I'm being so emotional again !

I guess the final exams really creates an imbalanced for me. D:

There's a msg I'd wish to pass to my dearly friend :

No matter what happens,
I'm always will by your side,
because that's what are friends for♡

I ♡ you Joc !

Ohh yaa..something random !
I wish to make a new photo album just specially for my baby Sidney!

too much pictures of her non-stop naughty patterns and silly look ! ♡
♡ showing me her *dulan* look cause I seduce her with food just to capture her picture :D

♡ Accompany me study !

♡ she got fed up! LOL

♡ sneaked into the TV room and accompany throughout the night.

It's fun to keep a pet at home.
Like my baby Sidney,
she has her own character,
she's naughty, ego, smart, greedy,lovely and hate to be alone.

Naughty when she gets lonely.
Ego when she's sleepy.
Greedy ALL THE TIME.
Lovely when she sees me sad, or see me crying, she'll lick away my tears, and lay quietly beside me and allow me to hug her tightly♡

how sweet♡
how smart♡
she knows how to comfort me.
seriously, my life is much more cherish with her appearance.

Glad that god brought her to me.

My baby gurl ♡

Last and not least,
spare some times for this song,

What are words from Chris Medina.

it touches my heart,
what about yours?

♡

白色情人节

2011-03-14T22:37:00.005+08:00

当我想你了

我会掏出手机

看看有没有你的短信?

即使我知道

机率是那么的渺茫

当我想你了

我会用拇指在手机上飞速的打下一连串的问候

最后却始终没有按下发送的键

只是害怕打扰到你

当我想你了

我会打开我们的聊天记录看一下

不管是什么样的对话

始终有种甜蜜的感觉

就像……

香草的味道

当我想你了

我会把目光投到很远的地方

却不知道在想些什么

当我想你了

我会想：

你是不是会想我呢?

哪怕只有一秒钟的时间

当我想你了

我会听你唱过的歌

细品歌词中的字字句句

当我想你了

我会把思念换作节拍

让它在双手交辉中流露

当我想你了

我会哭

但不会像以前那样
会给你电话给你短信

只会一个人躲在寝室偷着哭

然后在你来电话的时候

假装放了静音不接

之后平淡的发个短信回去问你

"有事么?"

当我想你了

我会深吸一口气

把弥漫了思念味道的空气吸进

离心脏最近的地方

Happy White Valentine's Day hubby. I Love you.

4th Monthsary ♥

2011-03-06T16:25:00.003+08:00

Its been almost a month since the last update. Ohmaii ! I'm now a lazy blogger. I don't even have a CNY post! gosh. Lebih-ism already ! hai lat ! muahahahaha

lol I starting to sounds like Honey Lee already, by saying all these IMBAs neh, byebye lu, hai lat, oh maiii god! , etc.

LOL~

the CNY was boring than last year. but is also kinda special this year.
lol
I don't wish to blog an old old post here.
but all I wanna say, and wanna express is..
what makes me feel CNY are joyful is because of my hubby,
its our first time celebrating CNY; it's the very first time I had a strong vision for a guy I fell in love with;
its a sign of a new life, most importantly. (:

I think I should name this post "Hubby Post" instead.

cause what I'm about to post is all about him him him him. LOL.
seems like I'm over obsessed already.

muahahahaha. wtf ! hopefully I don't sounds like a brat. teehee.

It was our 4th monthsary. and it was also our first time taking a trip together.
LOL well this is said by my hubby, it sounds real funny thou when the words speak out from his mouth.

lmao.

hubby brought me way up to Genting at 1am +,
my very first time stepping into the Casino,
surprisingly not stopping by the people there to require to check my IC.

aiks. should I feel glad or what?

It just telling me that I'm looking "lou sui" jek lo.. in other word, MATURE.
lol I'm not yet 21 0:
don't like that lo I'll had hard feeling.

muahahahahaha
oh yea
and I got home at 6am. :O

I'm such a naughty daughter.
but I still choose to tell the truth~
cause it's really nothing to hide after all...

and seriously speaking, I really had fun and I wish to stay happy all day long in our special date♥

*teehee* mummy says she's gonna screw my hubby when she sees him.

uhh-ohh trouble~

but she saying it in a cheerful way, try to act angry but PHAILED!
cause she also couldn't resist my excitableness !

hehehehe *evil laughing*

well well there's gonna ZERO pictures appearing here.
I look seriously awful with my pale and acne face! :(
and also the forever-won't-gone eye bag hanging under my eyes !

gosh I really need to sleep early and start taking care of my health.
now my sleeping time is like huh, 3am -.-.
lebih-ism.

oooppsss...
going out later again for our ms. Pit thing 21st Birthday celebration♥

which means gonna let baba mama ngi ngi ngo ngo again..
haha..

whatever ;)

Life is a process ! choose to LIVE it the fullest, or just leave it.

I'm showing my choice now ;)

yours?

lol.

It doesn't matter how other people look at you.
What is important is how you look yourself.

sweethearts

2011-02-10T03:14:00.005+08:00

Don't know why.
I just simply miss the old days....

not that I dislike the life and peoples that I'm having now..
is just...
I simply miss the simplest moments we used to have...

It was 2006...
me & my dear Jocelyn..

I'm fated to love this girl for my life. ♥
she's always there for me, so as I.

It was 2009..
my dear cyan..
known her when I was 13..
the best girl I've ever known..

glad that I found you and had you in my life.
Appreciate you forever and always ♥

♥2011♥
Mr. Seow
A guy that has the same life thought as mine.
7 years friendship ain't easy..
who says there's no pure friendship between a guy & a girl?
there is. &

we're the best example.
♥

the 3 of us..
♥♥♥

mates that I known for years. ?
How fortunate I was to have you guys around until now..?

gosh.
I miss the old times badly.
how we used to be.
but life still goes on..

I still love the current moment,

because I've met you,
and I never regret anything,
because at some point everything I did was what I wanted to do.
because it was you, the one I love.

"I don't have the prettiest face to look at, or the skinniest waist to hold, but I do have the biggest heart to love you with."

never doubt.

不能说的秘密

2011-02-07T02:19:00.005+08:00

新年快乐。
又是一年了…

时间，真的不留人。
岁月更不留人…

我怀念，以前的我们，
以前的我……
真的真的有种不想长大的感觉。
其实我真的没自己想像中的坚强吧

我害怕面对现实里种种的不单纯
我害怕接受现实就是那样残酷的事实
我害怕未来的那一天，我是一无所有的。

我好忧郁。
太多情绪被压抑着
那些不能说的秘密

我以为我是坚强的
我以为我承受压力的能力很高
我以为我很会隐藏
原来我以为的只是我的以为……

如果我是你，
我相信我真的没有办法面对
没有没有办法面对

当我知道
你一个人在背后默默承受那一切的痛
我真的很心疼
真的真的很心疼

我不懂该怎么说

我真的很心疼你
为什么不早告诉我

为什么要默默一个人承受一切
为什么不让我在你身边支持你陪你渡过那段难熬的时间

我就这么让你不放心吗？

其实这一刻，我很想哭…真的很想哭
我感觉到你当时的无助，却没办法说出口的那一刻……

我真的觉得自己很没有用
虽然我真的帮不上什么忙
至少让我在你身边支持你安慰你告诉你一切会没事的，会过去的也好啊

但我也安慰，最终你还是选择相信我。

我不懂要怎么和你说下去
我的脑筋理不出一个头绪来
我没经历过
没体会过
我无法了解那当中的滋味
我无法体会那当时的心情

我的心情也好复杂
你知道的

我的方向也混乱了
我也不知道能对你说些什么
我害怕自己的答案，
选择和想法是一种错误
我对一切一切曾经有过果断和思想
全乱成一团

我的心情极度复杂。

既然选择了，
就不要后悔，毕竟那是自己的决定
既然选择了，什么样的结果都得自己承担
因为那是对自己的责任
对
责任

我们必须为我们的选择负责任。

我们长大了
必须为我们的行为负责任
必须为我们的人生负责任

责任，好沉重的字眼啊……

share:

其实你自己知道，
为什么不能好好谈一场恋爱。因为，你不会再轻而易举把自己交出去。就像是，有一天你发现跌倒以后的伤口，会开始留下疤痕，于是走路时不敢再大步跨出去。

因为，你惯性太强、记性太好。认识一个人很简单，忘记一个人很困难。你曾经心满意足的闭上眼睛，让另一个人带你去任何地方，最后却差点回不来。所以不能再失去方向感。

于是你就变得胆小了。以前喜欢男生有幽默感，现在更在乎安全感。以前打电话找不到人就拼命的打，现在发了短信没回应，即使心中有波动也可以忍住。以前最有兴趣的话题是对方的过去，现在会先关心这份感情有没有未来。

所以，空暇的时候，你宁愿和朋友在烈日下逛街，也不愿让对方觉得自己很在乎什么。你安慰自己，有朋友就够了，一个人生活也很好。你忘记了当另一个人女朋友的感觉，当那个人出现时，你开始慌张、害怕。

这些话，有说进你心坎里去吗？

你知道我是爱你的，所以别再傻傻的自己承受，你要记得我永远会在你身边。

原来多的是我不知道的事。

宝贝我好想你，快回来好吗？晚安。07/02/11 3.10am

Random

2011-01-30T03:44:00.001+08:00

Sigh. I guess I really put on weight already. My face getting round & round ! Oh well I eat like 4-5 meals per day? So this is what I get, good result perhaps, lecturer said I was metabolism enough :( aduii insulting me or what? I really need to diet, serious one but the bf doesn't like diet this word. Okay perhaps 2 meals per day? But I don't think is possible cause i'll get hungry easily :( ohmaiigod !! HELP :(:(:( !! Yeah yeah CNY is coming real soon :D well don't think I hv plenty plans for the holiday, actually I have no Whr to go! No hometown to balik ! I'm excited cause it's the FIRST CNY Celebration with you :) my baby bf ! Teehee.. ! Guess what, i'm so in love.. I found you finally.. You make me wanna say oh oh oh mai gosh I love you baby ! Lol is the middle of the night now and truth is I've got no one to talk to at this hour, that's y i'm blogging nonsense here. Lol but I just can't help it I need to express my feelings ! :D I feel so glad having him in my life, thanks to someone, not because of him I wouldn't get to be with my sweet baby ! Lastly, sweet reminder for me and darling, we're unbeatable, kita adalah fighter! We gonna be warrior not worrier ! Same goes to my sweetie joc, no matter what always Rmb you still have me by your side loving you ! Teehee.. Happy chinese new year and happy holidays dears,darlings and buddies :D !

乱

2011-01-24T01:40:00.006+08:00

我的心好乱
乱乱乱噢

提不起劲的…

偶爾會有種想消失的念頭…
不是那种消失
就
只想单纯的逃离这里
只想逃离我熟悉的这里

谢谢你带我去作疯狂的事
谢谢你带我去吹吹风，吹走我凌乱的心情
谢谢你我的老友

我喜欢这样偶尔的任性
去吹吹冷风
喝杯热热的星巴克经典巧克力
说说话

温暖。

把心事憋着的感觉不好，
真的不好受。

不了解，不懂你在乎的人的想法是悲哀的。
那么两个个体怎么快乐？

宝贝我的心好乱
乱糟糟的
其实我想大哭
可是我找没有理由
我没有理由
因为我是幸福的
因为我是快乐的

因为只要你快乐，我就快乐。

If you truly love someone,
then the only thing you want for them is to be happy....
even if its not with you.

As long you're happy. So do I.

就这样简简单单的好不好

信任，回来好吗？
不安，快快离开好吗？

过错是一时的遗憾，
错过就是一生的遗憾。

新年快乐。
祝福你。

the random

2011-01-17T01:36:00.003+08:00

They said the world is soon coming to the end.
END OF THE WORLD?
this year MAY or DECEMBER 2012?

Idk.... I just realized there's many disasters news happened out there and most of it are cannot be explain WHY?

They said we shall start to live happily, throw all the emo behind because life are really SHORT now. yikes..

don't know why recently I'm afraid of death, well...I can say I was a person that never afraid of death.. but now I'm afraid, very afraid.

I know why. I know why I'm afraid. Cause I'm starting to get greedy. Greedy everything about life. There's many things I haven't try, haven't achieve, there are plenty of dreams that I need to fulfill. I finally learns to appreciate life, as there's love, there's wonderful things actually happening around me, If I just smart enough to realized it. A simple laughter, a simple conversation, a warmth smile, is a kind of happiness already. I don't wish to leave the one I cherish and love, I don't wish that it is the end of the world soon. D:

But what comes around, what goes around.

If things are meant to be, so just let it be.

we shall start to appreciate everything, every small little thing that happened in our life. Live without regrets.

That's a promise to myself. I shall appreciate every single moment with you, you and you.

(:

My baby girl is growing bigger already.
Don't know how to describe the feeling.
She was so tiny before, lying inside my arms..
but now.. she's growing heavy and I find it hard to carry her in my arms anymore..

my girl always are my best companion.

posing <3

I just love the evening moment when I was practicing my piano and she's sitting beside me (:

♥♥♥♥

my boy

can't deny that you're talented but I won't admit it infront of you! (:

♥♥♥

Loves,

mute 17/01/11

2011-01-15T03:13:00.001+08:00

很多时候，只能淡淡的说一句

已经回不去了。过去了就是过去了…

2011

2011-01-12T00:41:00.005+08:00

Is another year passed. So is it true that new year=new beginning?
ahh well I'm not so sure about that, but indeed I really do hope have a new start, I mean I needa fresh starts and leave all the sorrows behind 2010.

LOL.

Dyed my hair red, but the color faded within a week. ahhh those color really doesn't last ):
will try to dye a light and brighter color next sem, my hair really damaged. Cannot put on any harmful chemicals on the hair within few months... BIG SIGH.

I wanna try something NEW lo seriously. Tired with brown brown brown )=

♥

ahh well classes starts.

got a BAD news for the start of the year. I'm unable to have the SAME CONVO with my pals, dears and darlings. As I'm stupid enough................ like what the bf said, I'm so unplanned with everything.

doomed.

I only start to take 1st subject of HR elective.. it means that 4 subjects to go including Y3's.. It means I need 4 semesters to complete my studies, which means, I CANNOT finish my studies by this year, CANNOT join next year's convo with my gang... aduiiiiiii you never know how sad I was by knowing this facts D:

I was too smart enough to thought that I actually can take both HR subjects at the same time which is BIG NO from the faculty D:

aikssssss

this time really COL= CRY OUT LOUD

what to do still have to accept the facts? blame myself for the stupidity D;

been nagged myself for long period, blame my childishness and got myself into trouble =///

gosh! all the sad facessss for the beginning of the year. sien jor laaaaa where is my FRESH starts? -_-

LOL as long I study hard, bila convo also nvm. LOL~said by my darling MIA TANG.

ohh ya I'm having tight schedule for this semester as ;
Y3 subjects are stressing me out.
TCM class started practicing already, which means there's 4 class a week now..
students going for exam..
I'm going for gd8 exam..

walao-eh-what's-wrong-la-I-am-not-super-girl-lo-wtf

my brain is not productive one FYI ):
seriously I don't know how am I gonna handle it. lmao.

ok done the studies part.

this year, I wish daddy mummy r being healthy than before and hope they gain happiness EVERYDAY.
wish my baby Sidney grow healthier and smarter ")
my sister can graduate faster and come out to work :P

Ohhhh ya I still keeping my wonderful friends around me,
whoa peoples, we knew each other for another year again laaaaaaaaa.
hopefully BFF forever*teehee*

LOVE life? ohhh I have Mr Jackie Kwan coming in to my life & I don't know, not sure.. whether it is awesome or is he the right person anot? I just know I'll automatically feels like smiling whenever I hear his voice or see his sorzai face. and till the end, he's yet still an awesome guy to me. LOL.

ahhh is too early to say what ILOVEYOUFOREVER all this kind of bullshits la.
action speaks louder right?

let it flows naturally♥♥♥♥

aim for 2011:
PASSED all exams including UCSI one, TCM and also the piano.
get a BLUE hair.
reduce pimples.
HTC desire HD.
gold key from daddy mummy.
make sure students don't failed their exams n spoil my reputation.

hahahahahha there's more.
will add up if I rmb any :D

2011

Loves,

mute 12/01/11

if its love.

2011-01-04T21:41:00.003+08:00

如果有一個人...

看到我不戴隱形眼鏡

而是戴眼鏡的樣子

看到我把頭髮全部束起來

劉海撩上去

素面朝天

而不是髮型很好看的樣子

看到我蠻不講理

拼命發火

髒字連天

而不是溫柔可愛的樣子

看到我出糗尷尬

被人嘲笑

而不是優雅氣質十足的樣子

看到我在家連睡衣都懒得穿

隨便套件衣服

房間亂得像狗窩

而不是照片里那種公主般粉粉嫩嫩的樣子

看到我在背後像一個壞女人說別人壞話

而不是你好我好大家好善良得不得了的樣子

看到我在家天天窩在電腦前

澡都懒得洗

頭髮像鳥巢

而不是在外面時愛乾淨注重形象的樣子

如果有一個人看到了之後

還能夠喜歡我..

那個人會不會就是你?

如果開始下一段感情

我不會再問喜歡我甚麼

也不會問是認真對待嗎?

我會問三個月後

還會爭分奪秒的關心嗎?

半年後一句不開心

仍舊會陪伴左右嗎?

一年後睡不著

還會百度故事在耳邊輕喏嗎?

两年後看見我落淚

還像第一次那般束手無策嗎?

三年四年或者更久

敢不敢一如既往

沒有理由的對我疼愛?

人生若只如初見...

當遇到合適的人

彼此可以融合生活

不管簡單也好複雜也好

就不要猶豫

猶豫之間..

他或她就有可能成為別人的人

不要貪圖物質的享受

也不要貪圖精神的高尚

世間沒有十全十美的人

也沒有十全十美的生活

貧賤富貴

開心就好

如果遇到了你

如果你做到了

我一定會對你說：

你若不離

我定不棄

你若离了

我定弃你而去。

Giving up doesn’t mean that you weren’t strong enough. It just means you realized that you didn’t deserve the pain anymore.

shelter me with pride please.

2010-12-28T00:58:00.004+08:00

Click on this * VIDEOLINK *
the way they perform & present the song was truly sweet and awesome ♥

Peter Pan the musical is playing at Sunway Lagoon from 26th November onwards until 2nd of Jan 2011~

It ending soon which means I'm gonna miss another musical show ONCE again.
the tickets are way expensive lor..
couldn't get a companion to watch the performance with me is another reason~
sigh.

maybe it just haven't reach my time yet?

LOL maybe someday I could play in the musical too?

arrrhhh Imma dreamer ;)

2011 is coming soon and yea hell busy schedule is coming up soon :D
can't wait to start school!

xoxo

appreciation~

2010-12-20T03:51:00.003+08:00

I've been seeing these faces since I was 13..
Its been 7 years already.

what life taught me was,
friendship would never have break-ups~
only relationship does.

so,
be my friend instead? LOL.

my buddies

happy birthday dude! ♥

宣言 ——[分享]

2010-12-19T14:04:00.003+08:00

不是碰不到更好的，

而是因为已经有了你，我不想再碰到更好的。

不是不会对别人动心，

而是因为已经有了你，

就没必要再对其他人动心。

不是不会喜欢上别的人，

而是我更加懂得珍惜你，

能在一起不容易，

牵起了手就不轻易放手。

世界上的好人数不清，
但遇到你就已经足够~

即使你不是最好的，

甚至不是最适合我的，

但却是我最珍惜的。

缺点可以改正，性格可以磨合，

但机会失去了就再也回不去了。

有人说：
爱上一个人，

是一种责任。

也明白了，

那就是希望看见他快乐~

也明白了为何那么多感情在激情之后变平淡了也能一步步坚持到最后

除了已经习惯，

喜欢到深处之外

还有两个人的互相搀扶

与不离不弃~

我爱你。

teachmehowtolove.

2010-12-16T00:38:00.005+08:00

Every time the heart beats for a person is such a wonderful feeling.
Be it the right or the wrong person..
because when our hearts started to beat for someone
it is always right..

Although I'm too late to participate in your past,
but I still had time to participate your future..
Ya,
badly wish that you'll never fail me..
am I being too greedy already?

*don't wanna miss a thing* from now on~

真正的爱情，要懂得珍惜；
没有谁和谁是天生就注定在一起……
一辈子其实不长。

能遇心爱的人，是多么幸运的事。
为何不紧握着他的手？

一颗心，是需要另一颗心的坦诚相待，
这样，你就会拥有幸福了……

Miss Mute

I miss my w705 passionate red!
hopefully I could get it back by this week!

cause is simply time to delete all the wreck things inside my M2 (:

ohyeaI'mInlove,Ican'thideorhelpthisfeeling,andIknowI'mterrifiedtofallindeep.

*shadow shadow please go away! I wanna be happy!*

♥

its been a week

2010-12-05T03:25:00.002+08:00

Its been a week since the last post.

well, many things could happened in a week..
sometimes in a glance, things just flew through without noticing.

my life had brighten up with your appearance, my baby girl Sidney♥

when I was down, sad and being fragile,
when my tears flows like a tap water...
you were there lying down beside me and lean your head on my lap..
you stop biting, stop being annoying..
and just quietly stare at me with your gentle eyes..
that's your way in comforting me..
I can't tell how touch I was..

but seriously, dog has better sense than human.
my life cheered with your existence my baby girl♥
mama love u!♥

relationships are fragile.
emotions are fragile.

Sometimes all you need in the end
is someone who will hold you and say everything is alright.

but that someone, only could be yourself.
stay strong
stay tough
my darlings.

I'm always here with you girls and I swear I'll never leave♥

that's what friendship meant to be!

♥

Rapunzel♥ The tangled tale

2010-11-28T03:34:00.006+08:00

Rapunzel ♥

Supposedly to watch this movie with my darling Mia Tang. But then end up watching it with my primary buddy Mr Tan.

LOL I don't know how it'll be if I watched it with my darling, I think the cinema would be just our voices. Cause the buddy complaints I was being too over excited and I should watch it during day time where I could join the excitement with the kids & children group. -___-
ahhh he's always good in teasing me but whatever lah.. I-DON'T-CARE de lor... and is NOT a sin at all for a 20 year old like me watching CARTOON and LOL lor, okay? =D

I grew up with DISNEY cartoons. I have the major collections of disney classic cartoons like snow white, sleeping beauty, beauty & the beast and more..Yea I do love classic. Classic is mua thing♥ LOL.

ohh ya bck to RAPUNZEL.. ohh well, how I'd wish the person who watch it with me could feels the same excitement as how I enjoyed? lolz Mr Tan was being too "mature" with cartoon. beh tahan lor. ahahah! :D

well her courage impressed me a lot, princess Rapunzel.

ohh ya this evil witch/bitch mother gothel freaks me out a lot!!!
Yea, I feel SCARED when I look at her! No joke .___.
I even shouted " ahhhh hen kong bu" which means soooo scaryy each time I look at her..
lol!

yea his *pervert* smile reminds me of somebody.
Mr Kong kok chung! LOL.

and yea, every girl wish to meet someone like eugene in real life..
but real life ain't fairytales, as long as the one you met in reality is not a theif. LOL
does true love exist? does it exist like how rapunzel know eugene is the one and true?

ahhh It was only just a dream.

and it shall be alright to be temporarily lost and dream in the fairytales,right? lol

LOL is 4.42am now.
My baby puppy woke up from her sleep already and start making noise..
she doesn't want me to fall asleep,
I guess she's just too afraid to be alone, like me.

xoxo darling let's go for MEGAMIND! (:

teehee! good night!

Catch me if I fall

2010-11-20T19:03:00.003+08:00

There are peoples, friends.. tellin me that I'm seems like a bulletproof person,
Imma tough girl in you peoples eyes, for majority.
People hardly seen my tears, except the close one whom I trust..
well, for those who have seen my weaknesses before, seen me cried like an asshole before, my family, my sisters..

Yea I remember, he remembers, my dear primary time buddy..Mr Tan chee hong. LOL.
I remember his unbelievable expressions when seeing me losing control on my emotions,

and he told me, that was the time my "tough image" that planted in his heart for like 13 years ruined.

hahah! I knew how much I freaks him out that night. he still complain lots abt tht incident, and he said he never wanna see it again or he'll slap me on my face! hahaha who cares man, oooi,rmb my crying face dude? like this! D;

lmao!
but anyhow, thanks buddy, for being 24 hours on call, tease me how ugly I look like when I was crying like a shit ass, insult me of being so stupid and moron. LOL. hey dude, you r the best buddy! :D

& never forget my dear Cyan, who always understands and support me all the time. is ALL THE TIME. gosh, sometimes I wonder how'd I be if I hadn't met you! The one I can talked to, the one that knew another side of me, the unknown me. (:

also, my darling MiaTangFuenSum, the sampat bitch that makes me learn that is alright to be ourselves as we can't please everyone. She makes me feel tough thou, coz she said she's a cute lady that needs protection, lol yea SHE SAID SHE's CUTE. okay then I protect you lar who ask u r my darling! I love you darling & I know you love me too. :*)

Ya sure, for most of the circumstances I know I definitely could handle it, no matter how big the impact is attacking me.

I'm especially weak in emotions field, they said it was my nature, as I'm a typical scorpio girl. ahah but whatever, I'm controlling it & I bet you guys & girls realized about that too. teehee.

Often tellin myself IS OKAY, IS ALRIGHT, I could stand firm, I could be tough, I could care less, I could avoid the pain..etc..
somehow I wish is that easy.. if the heart is listening to the mind lar. LOL

I craps a lot. I know.

but god knows what's deeply planted in my mind,
I miss you baby. and I'm afraid to have that feelings anymore.

I don't know where am I in your heart, most of the time
and yea,I'm terrified. I'm gutless and useless.
I just don't have any confidence in the love field anymore and that's the truth of the truth.

I think you might have forgotten that I'm a girl too.

I need someone to hold me
I need someone to take my hand
Who always understands

when people starts telling me
You will never be that someone
Who’s always by my side
To shelter me with pride

but
I will keep searching till I’ve found
Someone who never lets me down
Someone to catch me if I fall
To see me through it all

Someone to depend upon
I can always call
Someone who makes me strong
Who shows me right from wrong
Someone always standing tall
Someone who will catch me if I fall

I need you to protect me
Instead of begging me to stay
You’re pushing em away
Time to end this disillusion
I need to find out for myself
Before I cry for help

Until I find someone who cares
Someone who’ll always will be there
Yeah
Someone to catch me if I fall
To see me through it all
Someone to depend upon
I can always call
Someone who makes me strong
Who shows me right from wrong
Someone always standing tall
Someone who will catch me if I fall

baby,
how'd I wish you are that someone,

someone who promise to me love me and only will puts laughter on my face.

baby don't be the another one that just speaks loud on words only alright?

as I told you before, don't start if you're not ready, the words are still valid,you can still change your mind.

*failed* I believe I can do better! LOL

I might be seen like a tough shard, but I ain't not, I hate it alwyays bleeding deep down till no where.

yaiks.

I took 6 subjects for next semester including Independent project A!
and I'm going for my grade8 practical next year too.
madness. but I like it (:

I-need-to-be-BUSY.

你太猖狂

2010-11-05T03:10:00.001+08:00

能約出來的人都約光
能吃得下的早已吃光
很用力談笑比哭還絕望
怎麼挨得到打烊

我以為痛苦可以分散
於是我忙到不能再忙
忙到忘記了洗掉你所有短訊
一字一巴打在我臉上

思念太猖狂一個冷不防
一想起你忙碌的生活變得空蕩蕩
對心事說謊把你想到多麼的不堪
偉大的你還想我怎樣

我以為工作能夠療傷
甚至恨不得病倒再算
沒力氣遐想誰知癱瘓在床上
越發渴望你就在身旁

思念太猖狂一個冷不防
一想起你忙碌的生活變得空蕩蕩
對心事說謊把你想到多麼的不堪
偉大的你還想我怎樣

你也太猖狂一個冷不防
睡到一半才覺醒療傷先要哭一場
對世界說謊只把自己哄騙得更慘
想得到釋放只有投降

heart pinching.
but, is tear-less already.

enjoy the song from HEBE.

Roxy lover!

2010-10-19T01:41:00.001+08:00

bday pressie from my dear sis..thanks for presenting it earlier as my bday stil a week to go.. I'm cheered by that. Not because it is a roxy,it is about how you care and love me! I love you! :D

The baskin robin ice-cream, dvd and the air cond to pass 12am is the simplest & best happiness!

Hopefully My dear tomato lappy could arrive faster :)
I can't wait til 29th is too long! Lolz

Exam mode on! Both marketing subjects, hopefully I won't put awful marks on it.

:)

Black & white

2010-10-07T23:13:00.002+08:00

Life ain't being just black & white.
Sometimes the grey spot really could just freaks you out.

6 days to go..
hopefully I'm going lucky this time..

god pls bless me k..?

Seriously sick, and going pale.

Don't reveal the emotions I've hide.

Thanks!

I'm terrified.

2010-10-07T02:18:00.001+08:00

分手後，我還認識你，不過不再想見你，你過的好，我不會祝福你，你過的不好，我也不會嘲笑你，因為我們從此陌生，你的世界不再有我，我的世界不再有你。我不能再珍惜你，抱歉，我失去的，也是你失去的。我的難過自己才懂。

我爱你那么多

2010-09-09T17:55:00.001+08:00

看黑夜天空想起你的手
指过的那个星球
泪已不常流因为已接受

分开了你是快乐的

不幸福的人到现在还很多
至少你不是其中一个
在我退出后

我爱你那么多所以那么痛
当我发现我挡在你逐爱的途中

我爱你那么多爱得那么痛
每次入睡后都作了同一个梦
你转身轮廓

命运暗示过你的爱永远
像那颗遥远的星球

你是诚实的我现在明白了
受伤了人才会成熟

从来不知道自己如此的软弱
当我发现不敢再爱了
那一刻才懂

那一颗你指过的遥远星球
像一个我永远都到达不了的一个梦

random ♥

2010-08-29T23:49:00.002+08:00

It was a Saturday.
I thought I'm just gonna waste my night at home doing nothing.
but then,
Miss Joc never leave me alone,
cause maybe she knows I might go insane..
there are too many emotions in me..

she came to pick me to her house for dinner♥
how sweet ♥♥

rot at her room while waiting her daddy to cook :D

♥
was playing with her BB

while waiting for her to get ready for dinner ♥

after dinner, darling Mia brought us out for shisha session ♥
went to starlight♥
oh yea my darling's driving skill really freaks me out a lot =/

♥ while @starlight with dar's lime frizzy drink♥

♥no manners 1, BBM & tweet nonstop! ): ♥

and I realized I didn't capture any pic of Joc. I'm a bad friend but then she still love me lots! :D ♥

♥ my drink of the night♥ Heineken

♥ getting ready to get drunk ♥LOL

yea, I crashed it. I won't tell it how, cause its too stupid to mention it.
sigh. I hurt my dad's heart.
it's just a 5-month-old car.
sigh.

I'm a stupid girl. No doubt.

爱情不是等你有空才珍惜

2010-08-27T02:40:00.002+08:00

I was hesitated with the title at first.
I know the emotional will invades me.
and yet I know my eyes couldn't just pretend that it never seen it before.

如果有一天，你走進我的心裡，
你一定會哭，因為裡面裝滿你的點滴。
如果有一天，我走進你的心裡，
我也一定會哭，因為裡面找不到我的身影。

my heart was tearing..
the tears starts to fall..
y is this statement so fucking true?
and then I thought of your face.
and the memories that I seriously reluctant to let go..

你忙，忘了我需要人陪。
你忙，忘了我會寂寞。
你忙，忘了我在等你電話。
你忙，忘了你對我的承諾。
想告訴你"愛情"不是等你有空才來珍惜的。

and yeah.. it was a real hard feeling..
this 2nd statement..
I start to think what brought us this ending..
what makes us came to this stage..
and then I start to hate myself,

why I let you just easily walked into my heart
why till now I still reluctant to let u off my mind.
and then I start to hate you,
why come tell me you love me, but then at last you did is just hurt to me.
there are so much WHY came around..
my heart couldn't bear
I felt deeply pain..
I don't get the reason why am I still breathing right now..

如果時間能倒轉,我希望轉回到我們認識前,
這樣我就可以選擇不要與你相遇,
也就可以制止這一切的發生...
而我...也不會那麼難過了...

yea.. if times could ever flows back..
I really hope I don't know you.
I really hope I never know you.

是否我沉默了你才能聽到我的心聲.
是否我停止了你才能看到我的眼淚.
是否我心碎了你才會摸到我的心痛.
是否我消失了你才知道我的存在

yea..what if I disappear?

想念一個人，需要衝動的感覺，
思念一個人，需要深刻的烙印，
接近一個人，需要滿懷的誠意，
愛上一個人，需要十足的勇氣，
放棄一個人，談何容易。

its never easy for me...
too much of my love involved..
as for you..
you gone far, till I can't reach.
where are you now my bii?

相互依偎的心，曾幾何時，已漸行漸遠！
真心付出，換來絕情變心！
愛，被輕易擊碎；
心，已傷痕累累！
往日的美好回憶、承諾，變成莫大的嘲笑與諷刺！

is really insulting..
why the hell m I still keeping all your lies?
why the hell m I still keeping all the memories?
why the hell m I still wanna love you so badly and yet your last words are poking me deep deep inside my mind & soul.

人世界最上乘的課題，是戀愛;
戀愛中最難解的問題，是分手;
分手後最煎熬的過程，是回憶;
回憶裡最痛苦的感受，是我依然愛你...

why the fuck I still love you?
why I still wanna love you?

miss leelishan, can you just wake up?
you know your heart can't take it anymore..
you know your soul can't bear it anymore..

愛情再怎麼堅固,
總是無法承受忙碌的侵蝕,
你忙的天荒地亂,
你忙的忘記關心,
你忙的身心疲憊,
你忙的無所適從,

I remembered all your excuses..
in such short time..
you make me just wanna disappear, do you know?

我只想說:愛情不是等你有空才珍惜.

I just wanna say,
I hate myself.

I hate you.

♥ Joc's birthday bash ♥

2010-08-19T01:30:00.012+08:00

My dear Joc's 20th birthday ♥
Celebrated on the 31st July 2010
with the UCSI mates
and
also the crazy long-time-no-see bitches♥♥

oh well, they always never failed to drive me crazy!
=D

Especially MissRachelPhun here♥

captured by kah yee ^^
using Joc's brand new camera !
totally made-use of the camera functions & had fun on us.
LOL♥

@ MissRachelPhun

@ my baby delphineChong♥

@ MissOngBoonHue♥

@ Purplesalt♥

@ MissMute!!♥♥

@ MissChiaSookSing♥

the girls ♥ #1

#2

♥ the UCSI mates ♥

this pic is incomplete without my darling MiaTangFuenSum ♥

#1

# 2

#3

#4

#5

with birthday girl♥

Game time! ♥

with chivas♥♥

♥ Kisser Joc ♥

she look absolutely adorable, right?
LOL♥

heart her forever and always!♥♥♥

Dear Joc,

thanks for being my nicest friend ever. I know it's god's will for us being friends forever, and also being more like a family ♥ I'm blessed having you as my friends-for-life.

Yours truthfully,
mute

♥分享♥

2010-08-01T16:28:00.004+08:00

爱上一个人的滋味，
是苦涩是幸福的，
那爱上两个人的感觉，
有是什么样的一个境界呢？
同一时间内爱上两个人，
就一定是花心的象征吗？

很多时候你很爱一个人，
但那个人却做出令你失望的事情，
在你和他争吵以后，
两个人却又找不到以前那感觉了，
心中很明白自己还是深爱他，
偏偏却又隔一堵看不见的墙，
两个人是那么地贴近彼此，
却又找不到一个沟通的方式，
或许是因为不再对他信任了吧，
这时候的你会是异常的寂寞，
虽然身边有你深爱着的人，
但感觉却又像是陌生人一般...

也总是在这样的时候，
你的身边一定会出现另一个人，
另一个很关心，很明白你心中想法的人，
你的心事在他面前无所遁形，
他似乎能明白你心中所有的感受，
他也能带给你一股难以言喻的温暖，
渐渐地你也对他有着一股非比寻常的感觉，
你自己也说不上这样的感觉是什么，
但却又比有好感和喜欢的感觉，
要来得浓烈许多...

难道是自己爱上了他吗？
但总在你和他相处的时候，
你会想起你还有一个深爱的另一半，
保持着一定的距离，
却又想要他对你再勇敢一点点...
当你和你的另一半在一起时，
虽然还是能感觉到一丝丝的幸福，
但你却又不经意地想起了那一个人，

这样的感觉真的不好受，
因为现在的你已经难以取舍了...
你心中明白你还是深爱你的他，
但对他是什么样的一个感觉，
自己却又说不清楚...

如果说你和你的他隔着一道看不见的墙，
那你和他中间隔着的就只是你的他了...
做不出决定，却又不想放弃，
自己到底爱谁却也不清楚....

很多事情就是这样，
在你和他还未手牵手时，
你从来都不曾注意过他，
在你和别人手牵手时,
才发现了他的存在，
想要牵起他的手时却发现，
自己还有一只手
被另一个人握着...

这样的爱说不上谁对还是谁错，
谁辜负了谁，
在这面前似乎也不再重要了...

爱情的面前只有幸福的权利，
只要幸福的感觉不在了，
那一段感情也会随之，
而走到了分手的绝路…

从没有爱上两个人的感觉
思路很清晰，感觉也很果断

始终只有你
你懂也感觉到的♥

我的执著依然执著
尤其爱情的执著

来不及-罗忆诗

2010-07-31T02:15:00.005+08:00

想你是否已忘记？
忘记那段爱情
忘记那颗泪滴
忘记了所有不该忘的回忆

我来不及将你的手紧紧握着
对你说我只想要我们能快乐

曾以为少了你的陪伴不算什么
怎么我微笑着心却是痛的 ?

我来不及将记忆中的你消除了
我明白错过的从此难以负荷
如果眼泪能够证明我是爱你的
那么重新选择是不是来不及了 ?

还是
我已经来不及了?

眼泪有多少，盼望有多少，
一切只会让自己更寂寞，
困在失去你
是我最大的遗憾圈里，

原来错了就是错了，
过了就是过了…
遗憾？原来我们的爱情已经是个遗憾
没有人能改变过去..
我们能做的只是不要.. 再错过..

我要好好珍惜我所拥有的现在，不要让现在.. 也变成以后的遗憾..

我不懂你的心
如果你的心和我的是相连的
请别让它相隔太远，好吗?

Secrets

2010-07-29T18:33:00.006+08:00

Went for movie with my darling Mia @Midvalley yesterday after M.I.P class ♥
yea I still attend M.I.P class even thou I've got barred.
I still wish to gain more knowledge even thou I know I have to re-take this subject again next semester ♥

♥ our seat ♥

THE SORCERER'S APPRENTICE ♥♥

not a bad movie thou ♥♥

yea maybe some part of the show is a bit fake..
like DAVE here, the apprentice..
the pose is just like DRAGONBALL
LOL.♥

oh yea, the song SECRETS by OneRepublic is awesome.
it'll be much more amazing if you watch the movie with this song as background music.

♥♥♥

争吵其实是个掩饰，
大声说话不过是为了遮掩心底的恐惧担心，
而多数人只顾着拼所谓的颜面或一口气，
却忘了真心的沟通与真心的意见
是能带出平静，与合作关系上的和谐，
乃至共创双赢……

这世界上没有解决不了的事情，
世上无难事，只怕有心人…

people always seems to remember the problems,
but forgetting the solutions.
being coward, avoid from the problem doesn't help in the situation.
only to Face it with courage, come out with solutions, that's the way to leads life better♥

♥Do not lie ; I Love you ♥

2010-07-25T01:12:00.004+08:00

人，
总是不愿意相信，
不完美的爱情
会发生在自己身上。

一直到分手了，脑中热恋的激素退去后。

才开始思考之前的回忆，
那些好的和坏的回忆……

希望大家都是好的那方，
不愿越想越恨。

分手之后，
人总会找个理由，一个合理又不伤人的理由。

但事实上，
找不到，因为……
不管什么理由，都一样伤人。

不过最伤的，
是你爱到最后才发现，
你爱的人
其实没你象中的爱你。

一切过往的甜蜜回忆将瞬间崩溃。
当分手时，祝对方幸福是很有风度的……

可是若对方还是爱着你的话，
这句话只会伤得更深；

要是再加上一句：对于你，我已经看的很开了。

那心碎的声音，
你是听不见的。

那撕裂的心情，
你是看不见的。

留的住的叫幸福，流逝的叫遗憾。

我记得那幸福的滋味
甜甜的，偶尔酸酸的；

遗憾的感觉是苦苦的，心碎的。

有人说，能在一起就是幸福。
如果爱上，就不要轻言放弃。

没有谁，愿意带着后悔与遗憾过一辈子的；

信念，很重要。

心好空，
我
只剩下失去了灵魂的躯壳……

噢我想你
我想你了

愿你安好♥

♥分享♥

男朋友在乎你的体重有没有升；
老公在乎你今晚有没有吃饱

男朋友在乎你今天打扮的够不够漂亮；
老公在乎你今天穿的那麼少会不会冻著

当你遇到困难的事情时候，男朋友会安慰你；
老公会在第一时间赶到

男朋友在乎你今天开心过没有；
老公会在乎你今天遇到不开心的事没有

男朋友只给你买漂亮的时装；
老公给你买温暖的羽绒服

男朋友和哥们吃饭不会想你在干什麼吃饭怎麼办；
♥老公和哥们吃饭会不踏实时不时给你发资讯，一遍遍告诉你他很快就会回来

如果你够漂亮，男朋友会考虑要不要把你带给他的朋友看，长长面子：
如果你不够漂亮，你的老公走到哪都会带著你，也许你没有勇气，但是他会给你鼓励。

男朋友的家人如果不喜欢你，他会放弃你：
♥老公的家人如果不喜欢你，他会尽自己最大的努力去保护你。

男朋友觉的你们不合适，他会走开，即使他还喜欢你；
♥如果全世界都觉得你们不合适，可是你的老公还是会守候你。

男朋友只会限於他所认为的人知道你的存在；
老公会告诉整个世界：你是他的宝贝。

男朋友打完电话会急急掛掉；
♥老公会等你掛断，他才会掛断。

男朋友会在你烦闷的时候让你自己静静；
♥老公会留下来跟你吵架，帮你发洩。

男朋友在你特殊的几天里会躲著你；
老公会在那几天给你冲热水，给你讲笑话。

男朋友会把你说分手当真；
♥老公会在你说分手之后挽留你，因为他知道你希望被挽留，并不想走。

男朋友会在自己有能力的范围内满足你；
♥老公会付出一切都要满足你，即使满足不了，他还是会尽最大努力。

男朋友想的明天和未来很少；
老公会把你们以后的宝宝名字都取好。

男朋友不敢给承诺，给了也未必做到。
♥老公敢於做出了承诺，而且一定会做到。

男朋友不敢相信你们的爱情；
♥老公会把娶你当做他的人生目标，并且渴望和你一起变老。

如果是渴望一段有未来的爱情，
那就睁大双眼，看清，认清……

不过，恐怕这世上应该没那样的男人了吧？
*笑* sarcastically♥

The best way to an everlasting relationship comes from 3 words: "Do not lie!"

2010-07-23T03:24:00.004+08:00

dear god,

Even thou deep down you and me knows he doesn't worth it. He don't deserve my love. Somehow, I gave it away, I made my choice of giving it to him. As my love couldn't bring him the happiness he wanted, as if letting go he could be much more cheer, then I truly wish he gain his happiness in the future with my given away love. May god bless him & guide him to the right path. Wish him healthy & happy. God bless ♥

pixie lott-cry me out.
awesome song!

looking narcissistic? or sarcastic?
I can't judge thou.

♥

2010-07-19T22:56:00.003+08:00

No matter how hard the bad time is..
No matter how pain the taste is..

I should learn to bear.
I shouldn't have break down again.
I shouldn't have think about you first when I'm helpless again.

Cause you're no more the one that promised
to take care of me when I'm sick
to cherish me when I'm sad
to comfort me when I'm mad

not anymore.
those are just the pretty lies that I still couldn't, hardly put it down.

I learned your answer.
I learned your choice.
I learned your coward.
I learned that you're just the loser.

& why m I still being hell dumb?
I'm seriously lack of the courage to accept the facts that happen JUST right in front of me.

I'm just another coward.
I'm just too weak to tell myself to let go.

such a pathetic.

pain

2010-07-15T22:55:00.001+08:00

恨你
但更恨自己…
明知道是错的也还继续愛你,
放弃你的期间，你依然占领着我,
工作时，走路时、睡觉时、都在想着你。
一瞬间都没忘过你，
对你的记忆已经藏在了心的那一个小小的角落.
能不能不爱了？
爱太深太痛了,
你给的全都是无法兑现的诺言。

能不能不念了？
念太傻太蠢了。
如今只剩我一个人还在傻傻的思念。

能不能不哭了？
哭太累太倦了...

原来我的心好痛
痛得快要死了

我需要水烟的麻醉
让脑袋没有空间的想你
让一切的心碎随着吐出来的烟消失在空气里

这几天
我拼命的忍
忍住想找你的冲动
忍住想和你谈话的冲动

终于
我不忍了
忍不下去了

故意说了些话让你听
你问我快乐吗？
不
我难受得快死了

我只是期望你说，
你会回来我的身边
你会再努力
因为你还爱我
因为你还是那么的爱我

但你没有
终于
我哭了
哭了好久，好久

Here we go again.

2010-07-15T03:34:00.002+08:00

不知道什么时候开始，
你对我开始冷淡，似在逃避着我，
不再让我陪你，就连信息都少了…

我们不再为了些食物而信息一整天，
只为了讨论那里的好吃，那里的不好吃。

我们不再为了去游玩而信息一整天，
只为了讨论哪里好玩，哪里浪漫。。

我们不再为了连续集而信息一整天，
只为了讨论戏里的对白，戏里的情节。

我们不再为了某某人而信息一整天，
只为了说他的坏话，谈他的不是。。

我们不再为了冷笑话而信息一整天，
只为了无聊时逗你笑，逗你开心。。

我们不再为了你生病而信息一整天，
只为了哄你吃药，要你休息。。

我们不再为了我粗心而信息一整天，
只为了被你骂我笨蛋，骂我大意。。

我们不再为了小问题而信息一整天，
只为了跟你打情骂俏，闹闹脾气。。

我们不再像之前那样的信息一整天，
我不能再一直信息你了，
我不能再一直烦着你了，
我不能再一直跟你闹了，
我不能再一直关心你了，

只因为你知道我爱你，在乎你…
你忘了怎么珍惜…
你说我爱你太多，就快要把你淹没……
那你到底要我怎么办呢？

以为那次受了伤之后会学乖…
以为不再轻易的把心托付出去
当终于卸下心防，
以为你就是那个对的人的时候
你却又是另一个来伤害我的人。

我恨你，怨你
我恨自己的不争气
我想折磨自己让你内疚
我想让你看见我的堕落让你成为罪人

这些这些种种不成熟的想法
我想过也想实行它
可是
你真的不值得我这样做
这只会让你再度看不起我
也会让我看不起我自己

我极端，我承认。
在我的世界只有爱与不爱
灰色地带…不是我的作风

今晚，我没哭…
是想通了？
我不认为。因为我还恨你…
恨你在我受伤的时候治疗我的伤口然后再狠狠的在愈合的伤口上加多几刀
我不需要靠失恋来成熟。
单身也可以很快乐。
在驾车的路上，我开得很慢，想了很多…
原来爱情晚点来，就不会走得太早。
因为学生时代，
周围接触最多的人都年龄相仿，
所以价值观都差不多，都想着将来有个好工作，有个好恋人。
正因为理想差不多，所以2个人在一起会很开心，也就很容易走到了一起。
至于恋爱是否会影响学习，因人而异。

原来恋人不是靠寻找的，
因为在没有完全了解对方之前，
对方可以为了吸引你暂时改变自己，
而一旦你完全了解对方后，分手就指日可待了。

爱情不是和一个最适合自己的人在一起，
而是遇到一个更适合自己的人时，能够坚守自己对所爱的人作出的承诺。
对，就是坚守着…
爱情不是两个人眼睛对视，而是两个人的眼光看着同一个方向投视 …

我想你，我还是依然很想你。
但，时间会淡忘一切

看着你在没有我的日子里依然过得很快乐
我气
因为你说过我就是你的世界
我狠
因为我对你只是微不足道

到最后
我安慰，
因为你这样成为了让我不再对你留恋的动力
我高兴
因为我终于认清了你说的那些只不过是廉价的甜言蜜语

但我还爱你
还很爱
但，你不再是那个对的人了

把爱收藏起来
把爱埋在深处
原来单身并没什么不好

不是不想恋爱，而是，不想随便的恋爱

I'm trying not to cry, least is also not for you.
mummy said big girls don't cry.
don't worry mummy, your girl will stop crying.
she promise.

forgive me of saying this,
last time, may I?

ILY bii,
night.

title?

2010-07-14T02:07:00.005+08:00

Yea.
my emotions are invading me again.
I don't know why am I still care about you.

first thing I did when I logged in to facebook, is to see your update.. your status..
don't know what I'm thinking at all..
I hope to see post from your page that mention you're feeling lonely, you missed me.. You realized life without me is sucks..

& yet..
you disappoint me like you always did..
I know I'll be more desperate after seeing that..
but I couldn't help it..

my heart bleeds when I saw you having life much better without me.
your life still goes on happily without me.

I'm the one that being pathetic now, I know.

I'm the one that feels life sucks without you, I am the one.

I am the moron.

damn it.
why am I missing you so much each time I breathe?

should I stop breathing instead?wtf. Is that me? 0.o

but
guess what,

I've already decided to clear you off my head..
decided not to let you enter my life anymore, even as a friend.

and guess what,
I tell everyone that I've got through,
Cause I'm so much better without you.
& It's all pretty lies cause I break down, every time.

my soul is weak, my heart is fatigue.
I need shisha badly.

I was whispering that ILoveYoubii again. wtf.

confession I

2010-07-08T15:13:00.007+08:00

我选择把部落格封起…
因为我想你了
我想死你了

但我不能让你知道
我不能让你认为我的生活没了你就会失去重心…

我是个笨蛋

我
依然在乎你的一切
依然希望你会回头告诉我
你爱我你需要我在你的身边
你要求我别走…
此刻泪水好不争气
模糊了我的视线…

我以为你是那个会疯狂地寻找…
而不是那个不以为然，依旧的继续生活下去…
仿佛我不曾存在过
仿佛我就不是那么一回事

你说我是你的世界
你说你的生命因我而精彩
你说的种种
我恨…
恨自己为何到这个地步
还是那么的执著，固执
为什么到这个时候
还会不自觉地想起你曾说的美好

为什么你
给了我希望，却又令我失望呢？
为什么
每天的每天
我依然很想很想你

为什么
我的心要放不下你？
明明就
看见了你的冷淡
明明就
见识了你的不在乎
明明就
清楚你所谓的证明只是一堆废话
明明就
你根本没有一点值得我去在乎的地方
明明就
你清楚说明了，
你不是一个会问到我生活那么详细的一个人…
那我们以后怎么一起生活呢？
明明就
听明白了你所谓的爱情的美好
你说
威胁到我的安全，才需要关心…
那么也就是说，我得时刻令自己处于危险才能感受到你的关怀吗？

明明就
知道你不曾努力
明明就
看着你承认，却还暗地里为你寻找借口…

可笑吗
你又在笑我了对吧

我爱你
也恨你

我爱你
因为你进入了我的世界，给了我希望
也恨你
是那个我信任又爱惜的你，令我失望到谷底…

我想喝喝酒
吸吸水烟
让那酒精麻醉我
让那水烟冲向我的脑袋
让我晕
让我睡

你说爱情是你的一切。
你说我就是你的世界。

看吧

到这个时候
我还是放不下你说的这些
小孩都知道是甜言蜜语的话

眼泪排山倒海…
我好累…

我真的好想好想你江秩纬。

为什么不是你…

我想起那晚，只属于我们的激动…
发现原来当时的自己是多么的快乐和期待…

但到最后
还是落了空

droopy

2010-07-06T13:11:00.003+08:00

staying up all night & woke up with swollen eyes doesn't feels good at all.

I didn't missed the morning class, I was still awake by the time I'm suppose to wake.
oh yea I'm still able to drive & reached there early.
darling Mia missed the morning class.. & I'm really get sot plug without her.
realized my specs was gone during the next class.
you know-_- is my spec. damn it.
how can I lost my spec where it suppose to be wore on my ears?
-_-
left it @ the morning classroom.
I mean, lost it.
thanks to the cute foreign student that brought out the spec for me instead of want me to go in & embarass myself.
thank you so much.
even thou I don't really remember your look already.
I really do appreciate it. (:
& sorry darling, that I can't continue the last class.
I promise no next time.
Love.♥

I'm weak in the mind & soul

♥ 久违

2010-07-01T23:51:00.003+08:00

I've decided to write this post in mandarin ♥
just simply misses the feeling of writing in chinese ♥
yoohoo I ♥ that I'm chineseee (:

不懂为什么这个礼拜，
晚上上课都是我驾车。
而且还遇上雷雨。

路上好塞车
雨大得
我几乎只看见前方的红车灯而已
大家都好紧张噢

直到要接近凤凰广场的时候
才逐渐小雨

我姐，翘起脚
舒服的按起了电话

而我
却面对前方无数的车辆
在广场前面久久无法动弹
按刹车
按得我好迫切

注意前方亮晶晶的红灯了吗？
在这时候
我可爱的车
出现亮晶晶的黄灯
提醒我
要赶快替它加油
否则它坚持不下去

到最后
我们决定掉头，选择翘课了
(:

回到家里~
爸妈刚好要出去了♥
去久违的大姨家

上次是什么时候聚在一起都忘了
都好久好久了

老爸要我驾车
没法，就当作惩罚我翘课吧
明明知道我从迫切的车堆中回来
他老人家真是超故意的说
不要紧
这点小事我还能为他尽心
♥

大姨家
永远就是那么的温暖
来到这里
从不会饿肚子
大姨和姨丈都属厨艺超凡的噢

久违的猪大肠
感谢姨丈~
天知道我有多怀念这极品吖 (:
噢不
这是猪大肠
和我曾尝过的猪肠是不同的噢
原来平时吃的是猪小肠^^

超赞的说！
我的最爱♥

边吃边喝茶
有助消化~

说真的
这猪大肠根本喂不饱我的肠胃

呵呵
都说了
到了大姨家永不会饿肚子噢

王记的独家内脏粥♥
极品中的极品

第一碗

再来第二碗

想要第三碗的时候
没了
太受欢迎了

但我知足
♥

对着他们
才发现自己的辈分
又高了些
是人家的表姨了
♥

接下来
榴莲时刻

没特别的爱
也没有不爱它

大家说
它是猫山王的品种
好像很有名似的
但可惜啊
我不懂得欣赏
♥

我喜欢这照片
我爱我的小宝贝杨哲宇

这是久违的感觉
多久没这样聚在一起了？
多久没这样好好的坐下来
喝喝茶聊聊天

我怀念
以前的我们

♥

我想说

2010-06-25T03:21:00.003+08:00

我希望你希望希望你
真的有把我的给话听进去。
因为我只说这次而已了
因为我还是很在乎
所以我挽留我回头
我愿意再让自己冒险一次
我愿意再给你时间，机会
也愿意让自己再受伤？

你总说，都是我在胡思乱想
但你自己心底清楚
这是为什么
你是难辞其咎的吧

我想说，
若你真心的想和我一起走向未来
请你
请你
好好珍惜我好吗？

我想说，
美好的事是没有一步登天的
若你继续这种态度
我不懂我的爱能坚持多久

我想说，
每次的争执都让我爱少了些
这样也好吧
这样公平吧
你爱我不多了那我也爱少你吧

我想说，
这样的念头
似乎好难再往前走了
但我答应了我会努力
希望你不会再令我失望了吧

我想说，
其实我很想你
我懂你很忙
所以
我也会让自己忙起来

我想说，
我有淡淡的感伤
因为
我和你都好像回不了当初的感觉了
是热恋期过了吧
那它真的过得太快了吧

我想说，
其实我好想
就那样抛开我和你的一切
去重新开始没有你的生活

其实我想
彻彻底底地抽离你的生活
因为
我发现
我不再是你曾说的，
我是你的世界
我是你的一切

我不再那样的被你需要了

我想说，
这种感觉让我很无助

我想说，
我希望我是那个你可以说话的人
我希望我是那个可以是最了解你的人
可以是你第一时间想起的人

我想说，
我们之间真的好脆弱
彼此内心藏有各自的心事
和爱的人吵架，和陌生人讲心里话
这种感觉我讨厌。

爱人，答应我好吗
就算我们吵架了
请别隐藏你的内心话
让我们好好的互相了解，然后开解
如果你是像我一样想好好的守护这段感情。

我想说，
我说太多了
我让身边的人都担心了。

我想说，
我真的想好好的好好的
经营这段爱情
但
我不能再这样沉醉于当初那些
曾让我感动万分的回忆了

毕竟你走远了
我也不好再逗留于那些美好

我想说，
想你的时候有些幸福，幸福得有些难过。

我想说，
I'll just follow the flow.
I had already tried what I can♥
Let the time, you, and the feeling proves me everything.
meanwhile, I shall try hard to remember who m I, who are myself,
where the family shall be the first at my heart, friends @ the 2nd, edu/career @ the 3rd, while last for love.
I hope I could learn to be more independent on my emotion & start to refuse emotion to control my action, which is my weakest point.
I hope I could learn to be more independent on my thoughts rather than get influence easily & lost myself..perhaps I should learn to care less ♥

hello people,

is Miss Mute here♥

I shall start my time my day my life with smile always, learn to ignore ignore ignore people who doesn't even give a damn to me!♥

(:

A day a smile, keeps sorrows away!!

♥daddy♥mummy♥stupidsis♥mycousins♥dearcyan,jamen♥darlingMia,joclee♥ladiesman;ahlee♥broalex♥senior♥facebook♥
♥mybiikongzherwai♥

2010-06-24T12:08:00.001+08:00

Yea I still can do whatever I want in my dreams.
there's still you in there, the old time us.

♥

20th.

2010-06-20T03:26:00.002+08:00

you know that you're all I ever wanted.

♥ happy 2monthsary my bii ♥

ILY

"I Told You So"

2010-06-18T17:50:00.003+08:00

I heard this song on the radio which sounds so familiar to me..

"I told you so" by carrie underwood..

Then I searched youtube. & I recalled. I watched her performance through American Idol previsouly which her song impressed me very much.

:)

Suppose I called you up tonigh
tAnd told you that I love you
And suppose I said I wanna come back home
And suppose I cried and said I finally learned my lesson
And I'm tired of spending all my time alone
If I told you that I realize you're all I ever wanted
And it's killing me to be so far away
Would you tell me that you love me to
And when we cry together
Would you simply laugh at me and say

I told you so
Oh, I told you soI
told you someday you'd come crawling back
and asking me to take you in
I told you so
But you had to go
Now I found somebody new and you will
never break my heart in two again

If I got down on my knees
and told you I was yours forever
Would you get down on yours too and take my hand
Would we get that old time feeling
Would we laugh and cry for hours
The way we did when our love first began

the bestie b'day ♥

2010-06-13T16:35:00.012+08:00

Yea this year we celebrate miss cyan bday together again ♥
well, what can I say.. we knew each other since secondary till now..
yea I do agree what scottie told me, It's a pleasure to know and to have you krs friends together♥

Had dinner @ Kuchai Lama, Steamboat, Teppanyaki & BBQ restaurant :)

@ V.I.P room~ 12 seats for 12 of us ♥

We're eating shabu shabu :D

& my ♥ TOMYAM soup~~

♥ all mine ♥ ^^
well the empty plate...used up few seconds to finish it..
coz the girls can't tolerate d smell of it D;

yea yea is PORK INTESTINE muahahahaha
mua LOVE♥
teehee♥

after dinner~
headed to BANGSAR for drink ♥
went back to the same bar as last christmas..
D'Haven (:

playing crazy games.. LOL
with their funny poses & actions!

Miss cyan's jelly cake ♥♥

I've got the B..! for bii♥ hee

Tky the shisha noob KID :D

Heineken ♥

when ryan refuse to.?? 4got wad's d reasont tht made him drink.. lol

Miss Rachel Phun is standing on the chair singing b'day song out loud.. :D

LOL♥ screamed this as loud I as could tht night! muahahahaha!

gay hug ♥

LOL! feels weird seeing them two like tht... =P

hmm... real gay lor haha =D

best pic of the night! ♥♥
(: you know i know! lol

frienship forever♥

It's lucky to have you guys with me.. even thou we doesn't meet often♥
but you're there, I there.
you're here, I'm here.
glad to have all of you with me ♥

cheersss for mua b'day gal LEESEEYAN~♥
sincerely wish you could fulfil your dreamss♥♥

Love.

random lovie ♥

2010-06-10T02:28:00.005+08:00

It was daddy's birthday on Monday~ So me & sis decided to surprise him with a cake...
but the "surprise" didn't turn out successfully..
due to some reason lar.. my dad has a lousy wife =X ooopssssy lol
LOL! but, there are some hilarious part happened between us 3..
yeap 3.. me, mua sis & dad..
the memory we have together, juz between father & daughter ^^

I ♥ you daddy!

& yeah... 2nd day~ was Tuesday..
I often missed M.I.P lecture class, due to its an 8am class..
I find that is very very difficult for me to wake early in the morning now =X
So.. I swore to myself that I'll wake early & take McD breakfast before I go for class on Tuesday!

& yeah, I did it =D

♥♥♥

but.. once again I ordered the wrong one...
this is not what I want..
=X

I make sure I'll order the CORRECT one next week =)
yeah, mark my word, is next week.

I will wake early.
for sure, I swear! ♥

:)

coz it's mid-term next week!! LOL :D

after class...
err... I mean after I skipped 2 classes = =
yea I know is a bad.. arghhh but wadeva lar...
need to take a break once in a while..
=X
don't tell me that I'm doing that often k?

I did not! =(

went back to tag my bii for lunch :)
teehee♥
actually I just gain for the TOMYAM pan mee lar..
not bii..emm...hmm...but still.em..hmm.. u know it! LOL!

after that, tag miss pitthing for hang out♥

& we get ourself chilled with ice-cream ♥

yea random tuesday~ random chit chat! :)

& wednesday! which is happened few hours ago.
yea, I thought that I might missed the night market due to..hmm..some wadeva reason..

but finally ♥
I always have my bestie with me! no worries ♥
mua miss cyan ♥♥

heehee..
nothing can stop us! the rain can't stop our enthusiasm !! :D

yea our purpose is to eat eat eat & EAT!
:)

asam laksa the best!♥
but tomyam still the top one (:

& got home with plenty of foods for the family ♥

& yea, I need to remember this day!
My bii frightened my little baby oscar...
coz of his fiercy look = =
LOL!

before I end,
I need to mention this! ♥
I juz simply love this picture! ♥

=D

♥♥

2010-05-31T00:48:00.002+08:00

And I know that I should probably just let go,
because I know that it wont work out and everyone tells me that.

So I try to convince myself that its better off that way without you..
But then I'll think of you, again.
and remember your smile that makes me melt

and I cant imagine myself with anyone else
and no matter how hard it will be…
I want to be with you

Sometimes I wish I had never met you.
Because then I could go to sleep at night not knowing there was someone like you out there.
Everyone is always asking me what's wrong...
but i dont even think it makes any sense, its just... my heart hurts.

So.. i'll just try and let go and wait, and maybe in that time I will start to move on..
but that's gotta happen on its own..
i mean, as much as I'd like to..

i cant just make my heart stop feeling things that it wants to feel
I've gone through this before..
and thats why i dont get why this is so hard for me to deal with...
Its the simple fact that he just doesnt want me like i want him, i guess, maybe,
its so hard because for a while there..

he made me feel like he did...

maybe thats the difference.

2010-05-29T04:32:00.003+08:00

爱情可以很简单也可以很难

这往往都是一线之差..

我在乎你
我想好好的爱你拥有你疼你
但
这已成为了你的不珍惜不自在

当爱情来到这般地步的时候,
当初的意义还剩下什么呢?

当两个人的观念信念慢慢的渐渐的形成陌路的时候...
到最后我们剩下了什么得到了什么

没有..

爱情是件很快乐的事,
我不允许任何悲观的侵袭

若有一天，你觉得累了，没感觉了，想放手了……
请你，一定要告诉我。

我不会死赖不走的，放心。

你，如果你爱我。请别再斟入太多你的悲观毒素。
你，如果你爱我。请你要明白我的毒素不比你少。

所以，如果你爱我，请多多让着我，迁就我，哄我。
我不难懂。
也不难哄。

对我表达那三个字，已足够让我软化，如果你真的那么死蠢不懂的话。

not sorry.

29/05/10

the confidence battery is getting weaker since today, I hope its rechargable.

night~ & morning 4.46AM

:)

2010-05-28T01:47:00.002+08:00

It ain't easy to hold a relationship;
where both person has different character, different personality, or even the difference of point of view.

sometimes, I felt that it's so hard to reach the balance level, where me & you would be the easily get hard feeling type. I hope to achieve the balance, cause is really tiring , to argue with someone you love & care much.
I used to be, the one that always wanted to win, no matter what. but who knows you're much wanting the win than me.
what's the point of winning the argument & loss the faith between us?
I hate winning in this, that's why I'm willing to bear in the sorrow rather than argue with you.
you said is a discussion not an argument. but, aren't they the same?
what's the point of discuss where you or me had already came up with a decision & insist with it?

I'm afraid, & horrified that, those harshness of communicating with each other may lead to the end of the relationship.

I never want it to happen that way.

I hate that I've changed. For ppl that knows me for some times, you all know I'm not used to be a tolerating person.
& yet
I'm now willing to sawalow in the sorrowful automatically.
I don't know since when I became so.
& I don't know why you can just simply influence my day, my mood easily.
I really really hope that if I can just care you less, love you less perhaps?

but words are always easy to be spoken.

I'm afraid that,
maybe someday,
what it seems to be important to you before had became meaningless, because we argued too much.
anger shade us up & brought us down..

if that day would happens, I sincerely wish that tomorrow never comes.
I wanna hold on today as we're still loving each other♥
cause I can't bear my sight without you.

ILY KZW

2010-05-27T04:28:00.002+08:00

简单是我要的浪漫…

你语气有心疼我就更勇敢…

你的背弯像片沙滩
既厚实又柔软
能给我心安

阳光在你心里灿烂
从指间传递着
总让我温暖。

we come to love not by finding a perfect person. But by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly♥

2010-05-23T13:17:00.001+08:00

我真的不想失去继续爱你的理由

没有什么过不去，
只是再也回不去。

2010-05-18T13:05:00.002+08:00

经过快30小时的煎熬

我终于入眠了

3个小时的睡眠真的不够

今天早上差点翘课
差点的意思；

我差点又忘形
当我以为是雨过天晴的时候
张开眼睛
我看见的是不安
我惶恐
才发现
我不在幸福里
我不快乐

3小时的睡眠里
有好多好多的噩梦
恐慌害怕不安统统侵袭着我

突然，睡意全走了。
醒了，
明白
日子总是要过，就算不快乐也好。

我真的好累。

我不想再哭
这真让我觉得自己很懦弱

我痛恨哭泣的自己
也痛恨为何眼泪总是不争气。

请教教我，

如何学会不在乎？

少一点的在乎，就有少一点的痛心。

我不想再为你掉眼泪。

to forgive, but never forget.

2010-05-18T02:13:00.002+08:00

选择了原谅

不是因为你值得，是我不愿意对自己残忍。

youknowyouloveme
&
IknowILY❤

2010-05-17T16:58:00.001+08:00

Darling 名言：
男子十个里面八个都是一样的，
追求你的时候很用心很卖力，
你就像是一颗珍珠那么珍贵。
追到手过后睬你都傻，你变成一粒米，掉了也无大碍。

I made a promise to myself,
that I'll never ever shed tears during the bright day.
I've stayed awake for 28hours, imagine that.
I've tried to get a rest.but my heart couldn't be calm & peace.
I'm afraid to stay inside my room.
coz thr r your faces around.
I couldn't bear it.

I went out.
but I skipped class.
I drove & wander around..
I want to get myself with a sight that I'm not familliar with.
I wanna leave this place..
I drove to putrajaya & got lost thr..
my mind wasn't focusing..
I don't remember what had happened.
I hatred there r moments I couldn't control my emotions.
I broke the promise I've made..

I've cried like shit when this song came to my ears

felt embarrassing.

2010-05-17T02:25:00.003+08:00

I was waiting for your explaination.

*silence*

you kept your mouth shut.

you texted me, said you're sorry.

but you know what,

you're not sorry at all.

I couldn't bear it anymore, I want to know why you did that.

& I called, screamed, yelled..
I want an explaination.

but what you gave me was just silence again.

I was driving, on the high way..
it's raining outside, my tears couldn't bear..
I couldn't see the road, it's dark out there.

your silence made me horrified.
the pouring rain made me scared.

I was on my way home, 1.30AM
it's midnight, thr r no vehicles on the highway
I don't remember how I drove home.

my mind was trying to persuade me to forgive..
I was thinking that;
you know that I'm outside, alone.
& I was silly to thought that you might waiting for me outside my house to make sure I'm home safe.

I thought to forgive you instance if I saw you there, right when I reach home.
I purposely drove slowly.
I'm afraid to know the answer
I'm fear to learn the truth

finally.. I got home..
& thr's no you.

I'm done.
it's over.

you're just another jerk.

small gather♥

2010-04-18T03:44:00.005+08:00

having steamboat dinner @ my place ♥

as a small gathering, & as a lilttle open house too :)

Ex-YuHua mates a.k.a. KRS a.k.a UCSI buddies ♥♥ Mia Tang, Joc Lee, Say Yean, Ah Hue, Ah Lee, Guok Jie, Choon Lin, Zhu fei, and cyan, pit thing brought along d stranger TKY :)

♥♥♥

♥ preparation
♥ thanks to guok Jie, choon lin & zhu fei for the help :)

♥ dinner process ~

♥ hiding themselves in the room PPS -.-

♥ enjoying themselves :)

♥ sing K session from 10.30PM - 1.30 AM

things always doesn't work out if it mention out earlier.
So, I'll only tell when it succeed.
& I really do hope you're the right & last.

♥

quote of the day

2010-04-15T03:54:00.001+08:00

fr FB application.

THE HEART SAYS
Mute ask your heart

-i've spent the last hour crying over you. and it hasn't been the first time i've done this. and i'm not crying because you've done anything wrong.. i'm crying because i know what you're worth, even though you don't. i'm crying because.. i may never get to be the one to prove to you that not everyone is the same and someone in this world actually cares about you. i'm crying because you can't begin to imagine what i feel for you. i'm crying because i love you. and i may never get to prove what you mean to me. and you know, i always told you i wanted you to be happy before anything else. even if it isn't with me. because if thats what makes you happy, then i'm happy for you. no matter how bad it hurts..

- by yasmien ahmed.

watches fever ♥

2010-04-14T02:38:00.005+08:00

wander the mall, & I came across a watch shop.
& something caught me in the eye.

♥

♥ Levi's Lady watch
♥ gonna work hard to get this!
♥ aim aim aim :)

♥ DKNY..
♥ just simply love the mild-goldness. :)

pop into TOYWATCH website ♥

fantastic ones ♥♥

I ♥ white! *elegant*

♥ Red is cute!

♥♥♥

still having final exams at the moment.
what I hate about exam is,
It's all about memorizing..
meaningless..
I get my brain to remember each sentence, keywords & write it all out at the answer booklet during the exam
& I came out from the exam hall with total blank knowledge.
sometimes I don't even know what I'm studying about.

for F.O.M,
I decided to not memorize total bout it.
I decided to write in all my own idea & own words, eventhough I knew that my english is broken.
I'm trying hard to train my mind.
I don't wanna fail myself in the hands of memorization.

memorized, do the exam, forgot.

meaningless.

meaningless.

I don't wanna score in that way, I gain nothing -.-

ya, I'm crapping so much here.

in conclusion I just wanna say that,

I screwed my fom paper today.

good.

pissed!

something app result from FB!

Mute ask your heart
-....I thought that by telling myself and everyone else that I hated you. That sooner or later I would come to believe it. But I now realize that by lying, it makes me want you even more.....

murmur

2010-04-13T02:06:00.004+08:00

你说我不懂
对吖我不懂
说真的
我也不想懂

我只希望看到你快乐而已
毕竟年轻的时光很有限
我只是不愿意看见
你让那悲悲惨惨的想法
影响你往后的日子

时间可以是很难熬的
如果过的不快乐。
你还有那么多的十年
想就这样悲观的过下去吗？

或许你又会说我不懂不明白

那我再答
我也不想懂不想明白

我只知道
以后人生的路，是靠自己走出来的

我只知道
我不想浪费时间净想些负面的事情

我知道你有你的道理

但你知道吗

我真的只是希望你快乐

至少，
保持乐观的态度

我也有我的不快乐
我也有我的压力
我也有我说不出的沉重
我
也不是一个乐观的人

但
我努力的

去学会怎么去接受
去学会怎么去面对

因为

我不想我的思绪
满满都是黑暗的画面

人生的美丽
不一定得来自爱情的

亲情
友情
也可以很精彩

或更出色。

衷心希望你
快快乐乐的
朋友

♥

Sem Jan-Apr 2010

2010-04-12T13:10:00.005+08:00

my 1st day of exam ♥
BB101 Business Communication.

I started study since last night.. gone through all the chapters by a day..
can see how "throughly" I've studies.
only scanning the specific ones..
LOL ♥
don't know whether is the pressure or others, I went to bed early.. but just couldn't get into slp till 3.30AM..
& I need to wake at 6.30AM.. to meet up the hao lian guy miatangwengchun for last minute revsion :)

almost FFK..♥

girls usually think that when guys are being serious, they'll look charming...
BUT I only see this guy like ma lao..! & HAO LIAN!!!

LOL!!

see? MA LAO TANGWENGCHUN! :D

see this guy so hao lian? type out all the tutorial questions & answers.. whereas us just study notes & rough answers only..=.=

I spent 80% of the time enjoy my McD breakfast,
and being disturbia to this HAO LIAN MA LAO guy..

man, seriously u X sesuai for being serious loh hahahaha
like OLD ma lao nehhhh...
hohoho XD

I guess he really felt so irritated by me today♥♥

cause this hao lian guy told me, HE USED TO, ALWAYS WILL STAY AT HOME ,STUDY ALONE BEFORE EXAM.

he thought I'm gonna sit queitly and study diam diam..!

YOU TUNGGU LAH! xD

LOL♥

ooi, regret leh? *teehee*

tmrw morning FOM ya :)
at library, same timing, k? =)

♥ some disturbia via narcissism pic of mine.

LOL ♥

way back into love.

2010-04-11T20:02:00.003+08:00

I ♥ this song.

way back into love by hugh grant & haley bennett

heard this @ bel's blog..

nice ♥ ♥ ♥

I'm kinda lost.
my mind isn't steady enough.
the rubbish start to attacks me..

tell me no lies, will you, you, & you?

because I'll believe.
even though I know that I'll be stupid to trust those words.

sweetest lies, perhaps?

Quick one ♥

2010-04-11T02:29:00.002+08:00

It's saturday night,
& I'm suppose to stay at home & get my ass n brain focus on my final exam preparation.

11pm, miss pitthing called.
yum cha with the krs♥
how to say no?
went out, without permission.
*Sneak out* LOL! ♥

saw my darling MIA there too..
it seems that I'm not the only one who never study.. *teehee*

got home & study!
hopefully I can finish it tonight!
it's 2.33 AM now..
perhaps I should say must finish before morning?!
LOL♥

& I'm still blogging & fb-ing like nobody's business now :)

did this evening♥

yum cha wif krs a& also a stranger..LOL♥
stranger happens to hv same fon as me :)

nice, we're RED lovers!!

♥♥♥

Joc, let's hunt! *woooohoooooo*

o m e

2010-04-10T02:10:00.001+08:00

somehow, I really do hope I could focus on my notes.

I just don't have the mood to study.

whatever. screw this coming final exam.

my mood wins! - . -

touch ♥

2010-04-09T01:03:00.002+08:00

有一种女孩子
在陌生人面前会很安静，很冷漠，
在熟人面前却很放肆，很霸道，
并喜欢一咋一呼的说：“滚，滚蛋，坏蛋，笨蛋”。

不要认为她很粗鲁，
她只是很单纯的认为，
大家打打闹闹，骂骂笑笑，表示更亲切，更不分你我。

这一种女孩子偶尔看到街上的情侣时，
也会幻想，也会羡慕，
幻想着将来自己的恋爱该是多么的帅气，
多么的温柔，多么的甜蜜
这一种女孩子，
喜欢和自己的姐妹在一起打闹，大呼小叫。

即使没有男朋友，在她的世界里，也有她的骄傲！
这种女孩子也会偶尔的忧郁，
朋友问她怎么了
她也只会说没事
其实她只是感觉累了，
她只是需要一个拥抱。

这样的女孩子恋爱的时候
喜欢大事听男孩子的
而在小事上调皮，耍赖。
不要认为她太小气，蛮不讲理，
其实在她调皮的习惯里已经为你收敛不少！

这样的女孩子不允许男孩子的背叛，
如果男孩子真的办了对不起她的事，
她一定会狠心的离开你。

不要怪她太绝情，
她其实很爱你，
但是卑微的爱情她不要，
她果断的转身只是不想让你看见她滑落的泪水！

这样的女孩子失恋的时候
会在别人面前装的很好，大声的笑，放声的闹。
当姐妹心疼的说：“你没事吧？”她
会放下她所有的骄傲，趴到姐妹怀里哭。哭
完了，苦笑一声：没想到我还会为一个男的哭。

若她喜欢上你，
请你不要在她的世界里消失。
她没有更多的要求，
不会打扰你的生活。
她只是想静静的看着你，
当你的观众，
仅此而已。

如果你们已经在一起了，
请你好好珍惜她。
这样的女孩子、太傻，
请你别让她受伤。

♥

memories in K750i (part I) ♥

2010-04-08T00:04:00.005+08:00

usually people only reminds of the past memories when they came to an old age..
I'm not an old person. Yet, I started to miss the past memories I had..
But, time never flies back...
secondary school time always is the sweetest & the bitterest moment ♥

those were the days..
If I had been brave enough.. thick skin enough.. mature enough..
will there be a better & brighter ending..?
well, time NEVER goes back..
never..
All I can do is look back, & smile for the sweet & pain. :)

I really really really do missed the past times. Especially memories with the KRS..♥

A person ask me : y suddenly so miss the old times? wad's wrong?

well, there's nothing wrong.. juz tht I realized.. the outside world really full of suckers..
sometimes made me juz wanna run, wanna hide. I'm not strong enough to get hurt again n again..
time couldn't heal me. what can I do is to seal it up. & the past starts to pour out :)

I was an irrespnsible prefect & AJK for KRS yu hua kajang. LOL.

see? my badge is still safe & sound till now! :D

every week non-stop jogging..marching...
when approaching competition..almost everyday exposed under the sun ♥
even though, tht moment I was feeling tired & frustrated and can't wait everything to be over..
but I still feel happy, coz I'm with you guys.. friends that I knew since form 1, till form 5..
people come & go..
& I'm glad, cause we able to maintain our friendship till now! ♥♥

camp ♥

junior being fooled by us seniors ♥♥
organized some lame games & got the young ones frightened..
LOL ♥
lil girl hold on tight :)

& they never know this picture exist.. LOL♥

5H @2007

desmund liew & Jerry choo ♥

obviously we're having tons of fun in the class ♥
wonder y we're so free?
coz teacher lazy la! this can explain. LOL!

♥ friends that remain till now ♥

♥ kah yee ♥ joc & ♥ hua xin

organized an event..
& wad they carrying was the stage.. LOL!

moving to another spot ♥

all yelling @ me together ! said I was blocking the way instead of helping! LOL!♥
how much I could block? think I'm superb fatty izzit?
LOL♥
all the bullies!

*stay tune*

朋友♥

2010-04-07T02:36:00.002+08:00

我們是很好很好的朋友

但是，我們只是朋友

或許我心中有著另外的人

或許我清楚現在這樣做朋友才是最好的選擇

或許我在感情上受過傷，不會再去輕易開始，輕易接受

或許我僅僅是沒有作好準備

總之我們是朋友

我真的沒打算做戀人可能也做不成戀人

气我也好，恨我也罢

我衷心祝你幸福

因为，你永远是我最要好的朋友。

Final is next week,
good luck to my besties! ♥

我会习惯的
我可以的

Teller of HerStory.

The One That Got Away

14/12/2011

谁 明白

Back to december

匿

October 26th

Love you like a love song

友情？

天蠍•

【女生】共勉之

HerSelf.Myself

Joc's 21st.

Random- July

連夢都失控•

60's

痛心

Westport

June 13th;

Enchanted

分享

Againts all odds

Just A Kiss

♡ blogging

May

first post from my lovely BB

what are words ； what are Love

the emo queen ♡

白色情人节

4th Monthsary ♥

sweethearts

不能说的秘密

Random

乱

the random

2011

if its love.

shelter me with pride please.

appreciation~

宣言 ——[分享]

teachmehowtolove.

its been a week

Rapunzel♥ The tangled tale

Catch me if I fall

你太猖狂

Roxy lover!

Black & white

I'm terrified.

我爱你那么多

random ♥

爱情不是等你有空才珍惜

♥ Joc's birthday bash ♥

♥分享♥

来不及-罗忆诗

Secrets

♥Do not lie ; I Love you ♥

pain

Here we go again.

title?

confession I

droopy

♥ 久违

我想说

20th.

"I Told You So"

the bestie b'day ♥

random lovie ♥

to forgive, but never forget.

small gather♥

quote of the day

watches fever ♥

murmur

Sem Jan-Apr 2010

way back into love.

Quick one ♥

o m e

touch ♥

memories in K750i (part I) ♥

朋友♥

谁明白